To Live in Forever
by Beiowulf
Summary: Sequel to Build a Home: The fire is gone. That should be good, right? In the dark you cannot see your burns. He searches for her in the shadows, trying to pull her out. She wallows in them, not sure what way is up or down. They both grope blindly, reaching for something they're not sure of, running to someplace unknown.
1. Chapter 1: Mint

**A/N: **Thank you so much for all the love you gave Build a Home! (Over 1000 views in the first week!) I cannot express how truly happy I am to have someone else read and actually like my work; it made my day every time I opened my inbox and read one of your reviews. I will certainly keep writing - and hopefully as fast as I've been doing so too. This is To Live in Forever, the continuation and end of Miku and Kaito's story (Not to worry! I still have RinxLen and GakuxLuka to do!). As before, the plot may start out kind of slow, but if I jumped into _**life changing dramatic **__**romance **_without any kind of lead in or relationship building, I have the feeling it would be very unrealistic and unsatisfying.

Stick with me and keep reading! I'm sure soon you'll love this just as much as Build a Home!

* * *

**Chapter 1: Mint**

Her eyes flash open for the fourth time that night. Just barely stifling the scream that threatens to burst from her mouth, she breathes heavily, unevenly, and clutches the sheets of the sofa bed.

Every night it's been like this; awakening up in a cold sweat hour after hour. She had thought that perhaps being here, sleeping in a new environment, things would change. But they haven't. Her dreams are still filled with pain and darkness, her nocturnal waking hours only confusion and fear.

A groan escapes from her mouth and she clutches her shoulders tightly as if she could hold herself together by physical means. She bites the fear back, the stress, trying so hard to just this once calm herself. But after only a few moments she falls apart, tangling in the sheets and curling in on herself, gasping for breath that won't come.

* * *

A paper is plopped down in front of Kaito as he works on his mathematical problems. Glancing at it, he realizes that it is the grading sheet for the house project everyone had turned in a while ago. 97%. Not bad at all. With a triumphant grin, he turns to the pink-haired girl next to him and waves it her. She gives an irritated pout, showing him her own paper which is marked with an 89%. He laughs and turns back to his math paper, finishing it by the time the lunch bell rings.

"Are you going to eat with us today?" Luka asks as they collect their things. Kaito had been somewhat successful in assimilating Miku into the lunchroom where they would all sit at the same table, chatting, like any other group of friends. Miku usually seemed to be at a tentative ease, however, there were some days when she just wasn't up to it. On those days Kaito and she ate by themselves in the library or courtyard.

"I don't know." he admitted. "I haven't seen her yet today so I haven't had the chance to ask." The two of them had not run into each other on the way to the college grounds and they had no classes together at all. Shrugging, he begins walking out the classroom and down the hallway to the class Miku should be coming out from.

He waits by the door until the small girl steps out. He calls her name and she turns and looks at him. She straightens up and strides over with a keenness that surprises him. Looking her over, he frowns. The dark circles under her eyes seem to have expanded, leaking into her cheeks like a shadow at sunset. If possible, she appears even paler than usual, and despite the way she seems to have been soothed when she saw him, there seems to be a sort of stiffness in her, as if every muscle is tensed.

"There you are," He smiles down at her. "Everyone was just wondering what you wanted to do for lunch." The girl quickly ducks her head and looks at the ground, fingers fidgeting with the strap of her bag. "It's okay if you want to be alone today. I just have to go tell them." He assures her and she lets out a low sigh, nodding her head. He gestures for her to follow him.

Trodding through the corridors, Kaito searches through the crowd for a familiar face. He catches sight of Len exiting a classroom and waves to him, walking over. The blonde boy inclines his head upwards to the taller man. "Hey Kaito. What's up?"

"Ah, Len," Kaito speaks "Can you tell everyone we won't be there today?" Len looks around Kaito, who follows his gaze to the empty space beside him. Kaito raises his eyebrows but Len just sighs good-naturedly and pats him on the arm.

"No problem." he reassures Kaito "Tell her I said hi, alright?" The blue haired man nods awkwardly and rushes off to retrace his steps and find wherever Miku went to. He only has to backtrack around the last corner until he discovers her leaning against a wall.

It wasn't unusual for her to disappear when he had to tell one of his friends something regarding her; perhaps it's embarrassing to have people fuss over her? Holding her bag tightly, she looks extremely guilty and nervous. He smiles at her, trying to convey that she hadn't done anything wrong.

"Where do you want to go?" he asks her. She shrugs apathetically. Thinking for a moment, a grin spreads across his face. "Let's try someplace new. Outside campus." He proclaims, striding quickly towards the lobby. There's a small shuffle from behind him as the girl removes herself from the wall and follows. "If we hurry we can get back before classes start."

* * *

"Is this place open?" Miku questioned, staring at the bistro in front of them. Kaito nods enthusiastically.

"All year around." He assured her and stepped forward. The door gave off a shop-bell jingle as they entered. The café in which they arrived was decorated in a calm Italian style, as if it had used to be a pizza place. The walls were white plaster with grapevines painted across them; the floor a green and cream checkerboard. However, the most conspicuous fact about the room was that most of the space was dominated by large coolers filled with ice cream. A clerk watched them indifferently from behind a counter.

"What's your favorite flavor?" Kaito asked. Miku's expression was priceless; she looked as if he had just told her that the ocean was yellow and made out of old chewing gum. Looking at the vats of frozen desserts to Kaito and back again, she raised an eyebrow and grew a disbelieving expression.

"You want to have ice cream for lunch?" She questioned, her small smile feeling like a wave of relief over Kaito. When was the last time he had seen her smile? Had he ever?

"If you could have your favorite food for lunch, wouldn't you want to?" He chuckled, gliding over to the display. She seemed to think on this as she joined him there, observing the myriad of flavors. The clerk drifted over and impassively asked what they wanted.

Kaito hastily noted all the flavors and made a random choice – it didn't really matter what he chose. He'd love anything. – Miku blinks a couple times and then blankly squeaks out 'vanilla'. The worker moves away without a word, filling their cones and returning. Kaito pays the man and turns back to Miku.

"Inside or out?" She glances once around the place and then to the sitting area outdoors. They pick the exterior and sit in the chilly January air, enjoying their unorthodox meal. Kaito suddenly remembers the grade he had received earlier and pulls out the paper, holding up for Miku to see.

"It's for our project." he explains as she takes it out of his hands. "Looks like we did pretty well." Miku reads intently through the grading rubric while slowly whittling away at her dessert with small precise licks. As she silently ruminates, Kaito turns back to his own ice cream.

"I've never had this kind before." he murmured, observing the minty green sweet-cream and chocolate chips. Miku glances at him confusedly. "The ice cream," he clarifies. "I don't think I've ever had it before." She blinks at him.

"Do you like it?" Kaito turns to her thoughtfully, holding the cone a little in front of him. From its position, the mint-green of the cream seems to match and blend into the green of her hair. Mint-green. He had never thought of the color as that. He smiles.

"Yeah, it's good."

* * *

They dash back into the main building just as the bell rings. Far off voices begin to filter out of the cafeteria and into the passages and stairwells. Kaito swings his bag over his shoulder as they reach Miku's classroom. She pauses by the door and looks up at him, an almost invisible grin - like a pinprick of sun between storm clouds – appearing.

"I liked that." She spoke ponderingly. Kaito laughed quietly.

"What's not to like?" The hallways are beginning to empty of people and he glances around, determining how much time he has left before class. "We can go again if you want." She nods and Kaito shifts his bag before raising a hand in farewell.  
"I'll see you soon," he promises, "class is about to start." She waves as well, but only slightly. As Kaito walks away and turns around the corner, he swears he sees the girl – who was smiling so contentedly a while ago – quietly deflate, becoming smaller and weaker every second.

* * *

**P.S.:** The titles have an actual meaning; **Build a Home To Live in** **Forever**. Just want to make sure everyone got that :)


	2. Chapter 2: Underwater

**A/N:** Okay, I've pretty much realized that the entire first few chapters are basically going to be one really long prologue. Stay with me! Things will really start happening around Chapter 6. But it's okay, because To Live in Forever is going to be _WAAAAAAAAAAY_ longer than Build a Home. Like upwards of twenty chapters. _And yes, I will finish it. Even if it kills me._

To Red Eagle:Kaito's problems will come into play later on, but for a while they'll just be hinted at lightly. You see, he's really good at hiding his scars. _Really good._

* * *

**Chapter 2: Underwater**

"Kaaaaito!" screeched Rin as she trotted towards him, arms spread out. The said man braced himself for impact and gave out a small 'ooof' as the girl collided with him. She hugged him tightly, her head barely coming up to his shoulder, as Len watched from behind her with his scowl of criticism.

"Rin, you're suffocating him again." The boy huffs out. The girl releases Kaito, sending a look of apology towards both males.

"Good morning both of you." Kaito sighs, rubbing his arms sorely where Rin had squeezed them. Len replies with much of the same enthusiasm, but Rin bounces excitedly – well, more excitedly than usual – and stares at the blue haired man with wide expectant eyes.

"Is there something you need to say?" He asks cautiously, not really sure he wants to hear the answer. Instantly the girl stills herself and droops downward slightly with a pout. Len steps forward.

"We're heading off for a recording, kinda far away." He explains, shrugging. "It was last minute; we're leaving at 10. We'll be gone for a few days, maybe a week even." Kaito nods and cocks his head.

"I see. Good luck then. Where are you going?" Len shrugs again, as if getting onto a plane without any idea of where he was going didn't bother him at all. Rin continues to pout and make tiny whimpering sounds, much like a dog being _this close_ to the squirrel it was chasing only to have it run up a tree. He gives her a sympathetic pat on the head. _It must be tough being bounced around all the time_, Kaito pondered, _stuck in the limelight no matter where you go. _The class bell rings and the three rush inside, calling out a goodbye to each other as they part down separate hallways.

* * *

Luka hisses in frustration as her toothpick bridge crumbles and scatters small sticks across the tabletop. Kaito watches in boredom; he honestly doesn't care about this class's assignment. Build a bridge out of toothpicks? They are college students, not a kindergarten arts and crafts class. In any case, structures like bridges and overpasses are more Luka's style. She is good at determining how and where to transfer weight and what material would be best to do it. Kaito preferred buildings more than constructions. The design of a home or office building left more room for creativity, less need for functionality.

Finally coming to the same conclusion as Kaito, Luka sweeps the picks off the desk and sits down with a 'humpf'. Around them most of their classmates are doing the same thing, some still struggling to create an archway of sticks without any kind of glues or cement. The professor doesn't seem to care.

Luka taps him on the shoulder and he turns to her, taking the earphone that she held out to him. Music pumps through and tiny speaker and they sit there in isolated noise watching the clock tick by to lunch. A familiar song begins and Kaito smiles, closing his eyes and reveling in the deep and throaty voice of Gakupo Kamui. Opening his eyes and glancing over, he notices Luka having a similar reaction. She stares at the album cover on the screen, a small melancholy smile teasing at the edge of her features. She misses him too.

The bell finally rings and they exit, Luka tagging along with Kaito as he walks to Miku's room. They stand together against the wall watching the students leave, keeping an eye out for their timid friend. One by one the people depart and the stream of students from the classroom ends. Confused, Kaito glances into the room, checking if Miku had stayed behind for some reason, but there is only the teacher erasing the board.

"She's not here." Kaito mutters with a frown. Luka raises her eyebrows.

"Maybe she's just skipped this class or something. She could be at the library." She looks around the hallway. "Let's asks someone who knows her." Kaito spots a head of green hair down the hall and runs up to the girl.

"Gumi, have you seen Miku?" The cheerful girl tilts her head.

"Hmmm, I don't think she came to school today," she admitted. "I haven't seen her at all." Seeing the expression of alarm spread across his face, her eyebrows knit worriedly. "Is Miku alright?" Kaito nods uneasily and sighs.

"Yeah, it's probably nothing. Thanks." He turns back to Luka and relays the information.

"So do you think she's sick? She does tend to miss school a lot." The pinkette muses. Kaito remembers that she has no reason to be as worried as he is; anyone else would just think her sick and go on with the day. He is the only one who knows the real reason that she was absent all those days, turning up shaky and anxious later.

_But that's over,_ he thinks puzzled. _There's nothing to harm her anymore. What's keeping her away?_ Despite the reasonable excuse of illness, he feels an ominousness begin to descend on him. Something isn't right. He notices Luka staring at him quizzically and realizes he hasn't answered her yet.

"Maybe, I feel like someone should check on her…" Luka raises an eyebrow and an unreadable air surrounds her.

"I'll tell everyone where you went," she declares without having to hear more. "Meiko and I will grab your work too, alright?" Kaito nods his head and thanks her, dashing out the door without another word.

* * *

Kaito raps on the door three times, listening for an answer from inside. When none comes he repeats his actions, this time calling out as well. "Miku? It's Kaito, can I come in?" Silence greets him as he unlocks the door and calls out a warning while entering, lest she be in some situation that would be undesirable for him to see.

The loft is bathed in obscure sunlight - a result of the snow clouds outside – with no other lamps on. The room still is as impersonalized as a motel room; no items of Miku's are visible except for the bags lying by the sofa, still unpacked. Heavy shadows lie in the corners far from the windows, and searching around for the girl, it takes a long time for him to realize there is something other than blackness there.

Huddling on the floor near the kitchen pantry is Miku, her knees pulled up close, head in her lap. She's dressed in baggy sweatpants and a huge sweatshirt that seems to engulf her in its dark folds. Her blue-green tresses tangle with each other and stick up as if she had been repeatedly running her hands through them. She doesn't move as Kaito walks towards her, quietly calling out her name. If anything, she just clutches herself tighter.

"Miku…" Kaito trails off. He can't think of a thing to say. There is such a powerful shield of anguish surrounding her that he feels that any words will just bounce off and away, never reaching her ears. The girl is somewhere else entirely, deep in a void that Kaito can't see the bottom of.


	3. Chapter 3: Bystander

**Chapter 3: Bystander**

There's a crackling like the demented ringing of a bell as the vase hits the floor, shattering into a million pieces. The young girl stares in shock at the remainders of the decoration that just a second ago had been safely perched on top of the side table. She had been reaching for something, her book…

Footsteps quickly patter down the stairs and the girl turns around to the sound, meeting an icy glare. The woman at the staircase slowly strolls over and surveys the destruction.

"What happened?" She snapped. The girl fidgets under her sharp gaze, trying to think of some way to get out of this.

"I-I don't know, it just fell-"

"You expect me to believe that?" The lady storms into the kitchen and returns after a second with a broom. "Clean it up." The girl shakily reaches for the cleaning utensil, intending to see to just that and see to it fast. In doing so, she steps on a fragment of the cream colored china, crushing it into even more pieces and grinding the remains into the wooden floor.

The woman shrieks and pushes the girl away from the pile of rubble. "_You stupid child!_" She shakes her head, upper lip curling in distaste. "Get out of here; go to your room before you make even more of a mess." The child blinks for a moment and mutters an apology which her mother doesn't seem to hear. With another irritable gesture and a curse mumbled under her breath, the woman shoos her away, and she plods off, glancing over her shoulder every few seconds for an 'it's okay' that never comes.

* * *

There is nothing more heartbreaking than watching someone in pain and being unable to help them. Kaito gazes powerlessly as Miku shivers in the corner, as if the room is twenty degrees and not seventy. The room seems to be the quietest place on earth as he strides nearer and nearer, close enough to make out every fold in her sweater and strand of hair. He leans down by her side, crouching on the floor. This near to her, there seems to be no movement to her being whatsoever; she doesn't even seem to be breathing.

"_Miku,_" he pleads again and she marginally lifts her head, gazing at him with confused and livid eyes. Only the very top of her face is visible, the rest still hidden in her arms. In just that tiny sliver of her being, he can see a million things. '_Go away. I'm fine. Don't bother yourself.'_ They're all the things she would be saying, if either of them could speak a word. He stretches his emotions, trying to portray his concern over his entire body as she so effectively does with her own thoughts. '_What is it? What's hurting?' _He extends his hand, meaning to give some sort of comfort in the warmth of human contact, but she just stares at him before backing away as if his touch was in danger of scalding her.

'_Go away.'_

'_I'm not leaving.'_

They stay like that forever, as clouds pass over the sky outside, changing the light from dim to black to dusky again. The whole time his eyes remain intently trained on her, his hand reaching. She lowers her head more so that one eye can just barely glance out and see him. That bright cerulean eye is red-rimmed and painfully streaked through with veins. Every molecule of her silently screams for him to leave her alone, but he doesn't move an inch. After five thousand years, she half-lids her tired gaze and hesitantly extends her own fingers towards the raised hand, as if not sure if what she was seeing is real.

Their fingertips touch. Her skin is feverish and laced with cold sweat. Slower than the orbit of the moon, Kaito closes his digits around hers and holds her hand in a loose yet sturdy embrace. He allows her a few more moments of silence before trying to speak again.

"...What do you need?" He questions gently. Her head lifts up faintly, a thin layer of surprise appearing. Not '_What's wrong?_', not '_Are you okay_?'; he doesn't need to ask such cliché things as that. '_What will help? What can I do?_' There is a moment of breathless observation and she lowers her face again, shaking her head.

Frowning, Kaito gradually untangles his hand from hers and strides over to the sleeping area. It's utter chaos, with pillows thrown across the floor and sheets tangled up in disorderly masses. He unravels a blanket from the knot of covers and brings it to the girl, who had reverted back into her original position.

He delicately settles the duvet around her thin shoulders and sits down next to her again, leaning his back against the wall. One pale hand reaches around herself and pulls the blanket tighter. Her head rests on top of the fabric, staring intently forward. Kaito follows her gaze, not saying anything, just sitting, tense under the surface of composure, waiting for the moment when she needs something.

"I'm sorry." The voice is fractured. Kaito sighs and reaches over, patting her head in a graceless form of affection as he had so long ago. She shrinks slightly under his touch, from awkwardness or fear, he cannot tell.

"No," he says "Don't be sorry. At least, not for…crying" He turns to face her and waits until she does too, ever so slightly. "Just…tell me when something isn't right. I'll come. But I won't know to if I don't know something's wrong." Her eyes hold the same incomprehension as before, at that awful house, when he told her he would protect her.

Seeming to still find words beyond conceivability, she nods slowly and sinks down further into her blanket. Kaito glances out the window and is alarmed by the retreating sunlight. How long had he been here? Searching for a clock, he reads _5:24 _and curses under his breath. The girl beside him tenses and he mentally hits himself. With her apologetic nature, she likely thought he was cursing at _her._

"It's late," he clarifies and she blinks at him, not understanding. He thinks for a moment and pulls himself up from the ground, considering that it is near mealtime and that some food in her stomach might calm her nerves. He paces over to the fridge and tries to come up with some kind of meal plan. Miku watches him, cautiously curious. He calls softly from the icebox.

"What do you want to eat? It's almost dinnertime." When there's no response he peers around the open door at her. She shrugs her shoulders pathetically, as if food was the last thing on her mind.

"Well, you have to eat something…" he sighs and studies the contents of the fridge. A wave of despair flows over him. The only things available are a package of spring onions, a few tubs of pudding, a loaf of bread_,_ and a carton of egg whites. Not even the creativity that came with being a starving young man could figure out a way to create a repast out of such poor ingredients. Shaking his head, he pulls out a few containers of pudding and slices of bread, popping the later in the toaster. As the bread is warming, he brings the tubs of sugary glop and two spoons over to Miku, who is still desponding uninterestedly.

He trods over to her and hands her a pudding which she holds in her hand apprehensively. After a moment and an unclear facial expression, she pulls the silvery top of and reveals the golden butterscotch goo beneath. Handing her a spoon, he retrieves the toast, and settles down on the hardwood flooring again. They eat their strange dinner/dessert in silence.

When she finishes, Miku holds the empty container in her hands, looking down into it vacantly, but considerably less wretchedly. He raises his eyebrows at her, asking without asking, and she nods slowly, rising from the floor, but still holding the blanket tight around her. He rises too and guides her over to the futon, setting her down and gazing compellingly into her eyes.

"I'm leaving my number, alright?" he says, reaching over to a bookcase and grabbing pencil and paper. "If when I leave you need anything, call me, okay?" Her mouth opens slightly but then compresses into a thin line as he writes. She takes the piece of paper he hands her and folds it, placing it on a side table. She then turns back, nodding once. He asks a question again, she answers, and with another tap on her rumpled teal locks he locks the door and heads back home, an uneasy burden that he couldn't quite name weighing on him the whole way.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay, Chapter 5 is where it will start getting back on some kind of storyline. I promise. This comfort/ ordinary life/ fluff stuff is actually necessary though because I need to show time passing and their relationship growing. Review with any questions, comments, critiques?


	4. Chapter 4: Substitute

**Chapter 4: Substitute**

The room is engulfed in shadow. Scrambling up from her bed, the girl dashes over to the wall and desperately flips the light switch, but it does nothing to penetrate the dark mist that hangs in the air, her mind, everywhere. She backs against the wall, finding some scrap of security in its impenetrable stability.

Her teeth clench, hands rubbing her arms where invisible fingers poke and pinch at her already bruised skin. She closes her eyes in an attempt to rid herself of the fright, but is only met with more horrifying images flickering behind her lids. Whispers darts around her ears; curses, growls, words that dig deep into her gut like knives and stay there.

_It was a waste for you to have been born._

She chokes out a startled gasp, stumbling away from the wall and out into the black obscurity of the room. Fumbling around, tears beginning to leak down her cheeks, she trips downward and catches herself on something hidden by the darkness. A paper flutters down onto her. Jumping at the unexpected touch, she grabs the parchment and feels the fold lines, the indents where someone has written something.

'_If you need anything, call me, okay?'_

She thinks of him, far away somewhere, sleeping as anyone else should be at this time of night. That man…

She tosses the paper to her side with a cry of frustration and hauls herself into a corner, plugging her ears to block the echoes of a life still so near.

The hallways are overflowing with sound as Miku waits in the shadow of her classroom door. People are jostling each other, friends cracking loud jokes and poking one another. She huddles even closer against the frame of the entryway as a particularly loud group of boys passes by, completely disregarding the small girl off to side of the hallway.

"Miku!" A shock of lightening goes through her veins. The sound is close. She whips her head to the side and takes in the sight of a familiar blue-haired man wading through the crowd towards her. She lowers her shoulders slightly from the height she hadn't even realized they been elevated to. He thrusts through the last of the students and stumbles in front of her, panting as if he's pushed himself quite hard to get here in a hurry.

"Miku, I won't be at lunch today," he says. She forces herself to look away, to not notice the way his blue eyes transform into a thousand shades of worry. "I'm sorry, a teacher wants to see me." A few thoughts like poison-tipped arrows fly through her mind, threatening to be spoken, but she holds her tongue. There's no use worrying him more.

"Yes," is all she is able to push out of her vocal chords. He shifts anxiously from foot to foot.

"I'm really sorry," he says again. She says nothing in response. After a moment of silence he stoops down to her height and looks her in the eye. "Why don't you go somewhere? Somewhere nice?" Go somewhere? By herself? Her thoughts instantly flicker to the ice cream café they had visited before, but she shuns it off. It doesn't seem right to go there without him.

She nods, trying to be as convincingly calm as possible, as they walk to the classroom he needs to stay at. Once there, he apologizes profusely again, and touches her gently on the shoulder before disappearing again.

All the air seems to suck away from the world leaving a soundless sensationless vacuum. The girl stands for a while, wondering if it would be at all possible to just wait here the entire lunch period. A yawn comes from her stomach and she glances down, nervously surprised. When was the last time she had been hungry? With one last apprehensive glance towards the door Kaito went through, she slowly trails down the hallway to the lobby, where she takes a deep shuttering breath and steps outside.

No one notices the small teal haired girl as she darts around the streets, peering in windows and dashing away from the street when a car passes. After a short walk she finally reaches her destination. A small sushi restaurant lies all by itself on the back of a block. She had never gone there but had seen it before and thought about venturing in if the need presented itself.

The door opens with a peal of chimes and she halts in the doorway, startled, and deciding that it would be better idea to just go back to the college without lunch. She is just stepping back out when a voice calls out "Miku?"

She slowly sticks her head in and peers around, searching for the source of the noise. Her eyes come to rest on a pink haired figure seated at a table, calmly drinking a cup of tea.

"I thought that was you. What are you doing here?" Luka asked.

What_ was_ she doing here? "Lunch…" she replied helplessly. The taller girl blinks and shrugs, gesturing her over with a movement of her head.

"Why don't you eat with me? Could use some company." Miku freezes for a moment, her fingers drumming on the doorway. Luka. Sung with her. Kaito's friend. She analyzes the situation, the girl, before slowly walking over and taking a seat across from her.

"Thank you," Miku whispers. Luka smiles.

"No problem," she responds and hands her the menu. "Pick what you want. I already know what I'm getting."

The waitress comes after a moment, taking their orders and whipping the menu out of Miku's alarmed fingers. Noticing the sudden wave of panic overcoming the girl, Luka speaks up. "You okay?" The consideration startles Miku, and she blushes slightly despite herself, nodding.

"It's nothing." The pinkette sighs and leans her head on a hand, looking at Miku but not exactly _at_ her. Her gaze is unfocused, fingers tapping an unfamiliar beat on the tabletop. After a while she speaks up.

"So…how's stuff going?"

"Fine," She croaks, not trusting herself to speak more. She bites her lip, brooding on what to say. "Um…how are you?" Luka strains forward to hear her but then leans back with a sigh.

"Uh, alright I guess. Just a lot of schoolwork and…" she runs a hand through her long hair. "I don't really know. One of my friends is just being really stupid lately." She shakes her head. "Not that it's anything new." Miku frowns slightly, attempting to discern the meaning of her words. Luka smiles knowingly at her. "No, you don't know him. I'm just lucky not _all_ of my friends are crazy. Kaito and you…" Her eyes are far away at the mention of the man and the shock of Luka actually calling Miku her friend is dulled by the curiosity that settled into Miku at her musing tone.

Before she knows it or has any doubts about speaking, she blurts "Why did you say his name like that?" Luka looks slightly surprised at her straightforward question but quickly regains composure, shrugging.

"I guess…it's just surprising. That he's not crazy, I mean." She glanced out the window. Miku followed her gaze and saw that snow had begun to fall from the late winter sky. "He has a lot of reasons he could've been pretty messed up." There's a silence as Miku deliberates on whether or not to ask the question that hovers on the edge of her lips. It may not be a question that should be asked. A few months ago she never would've had the nerve, but…

"What," she whispered, "Happened to him?" Luka's gaze flickers back to her, a dark heavy blue.

"It's a delicate subject," she explains and shakes her head. "Never mind..." Miku nods, preparing to apologize. Of course, there are some things that are not easily said. She knows this better than anyone.

"I don't think I should be the one to explain it," Luka clarifies quickly. "But I reason he'll tell you in his own time. I definitely think you are someone who should know, seeing how close you two have become." Miku's eyes widen at her statement, at the truth of it. She hadn't realized, but somehow Kaito was everywhere now. She saw him after every class, at lunch, usually on the way to school, and he almost always stayed with her after school for a while – in a home which was essentially his. Sometimes he even stopped over on the weekends, to check on her. The attention he gave her was odd. It left a strange feeling that although was not unpleasant, was entirely unfamiliar.

Miku nods again, letting the subject dissipate. The food soon came and they ate in silence, savoring the well-cooked rice. They paid the waitress as she took their empty plates away and Luka checks the time on her phone, snapping it shut and standing. Miku followed suit and the two strolled out the door.

They chat lightly as they reach campus, stepping through the gates. Walking into the main building, Miku glances around the lobby and notices Kaito striding towards her, eyes lighting up.

"Ah, Miku," he greets, giving Luka an acknowledging nod. The blue eyed girl blinks with an expression that couldn't quite be named and then parts from them with a curt farewell. Kaito turns back to Miku.

"What did you end up doing?" He asks as they walk to their next class. Miku furrows her eyebrows. Now that Luka had mentioned it, Miku began to pick up more and more on the way Kaito always seemed to watch over her. Why did he seem to care so much? Was it a front? Was he just a nice person? Why was it that he did so much for her?

"I had lunch," she explains quietly. "With Luka." Kaito seems exceptionally pleased by this news and little relived, as if fearing that somehow she would've gotten herself killed if another person had not been with her. Seeing his smiling face, noticing the way he so selflessly cared for her, and was otherwise kind to everyone else, she wonders what on earth Luka had meant.

'_He has a lot of reasons he could've been pretty messed up.'_

What had happened that had been so bad as to worry Luka like that? Kaito seemed like to epitome of the average nice guy; Miku had never thought of him having some kind of dark secret. However, Luka had made it clear that there was something that Miku didn't know about him. Something she didn't feel comfortable telling her.

* * *

**A/N:** So we get a hint of what Luka thinks about Kaito. I plan on there being a big reveal about him at the end, but until then you'll just have to read very closely; I'll drop hints about his 'scars' along the way.

Looking over what I've written for later on in the story, I realized how much Deep Sea Girl fits this. I don't think I'll use it somewhere in the story though; I don't like using really well-known songs and I think having a character sing a song that's so very obviously related to the story is a little too cliche.


	5. Chapter 5: Solitude

**Chapter 5: Solitude**

The boy stands all alone by himself for the third time that day. No one had wanted to sit with him, the new kid, on the bus or in the cafeteria. Now on the playground, friends bounce balls to each other, calling out names and playing tag. Not one kid looks his way.

He sits there, pulling up grass and knotting it into tiny green ropes. His hands slowly staining with the color of chlorophyll. A ball rolls over and hit his knee. He glances up into the eyes another young boy. He quickly grabs the ball and runs away as if the new kid carried some sort of disease. The new kid still sits there, watching him go.

He sits there his whole first year.

* * *

Kaito taps his pencil against his desk, running his fingers through his hair. His teachers had dumped a ton of homework on him and it was taking hours to finish it all. He sighed and flipped again through the textbook, shining the sunlamp down on the page. It was English of course, which he was terrible at. He only had one last page to finish of this agonizing subject before he was free and could go keep the promise he made as the last bell of the school day rung.

As he departed from school, joining Miku on her way home as usual, he noticed that the nerviness she had exhibited all that day had increasingly worse as the hours went on. He had probed her gently, discreetly, trying to figure out if she needed something from him. She instantly knew his intentions and declared her usual 'I'm fine' which did nothing to ease Kaito's mind. He promised he would drop by the loft later to check on her. He had thought that it wouldn't be too much as a problem, but as he realized the true extent of his workload his anxiety prickled up more and more every minute. He had seen Miku in that closed quiet state before at school. It wasn't a good sign.

He scribbles down the last word on the page – certain that it's wrong but not caring – and practically flies out the door, running to the nearest prominent street and frantically hailing a cab. The unease that had built inside him seemed to have slowly unfurled and amplified, like a crescendo in a fast paced piece of music.

He throws the money at the driver as he pulls up in front of the destined apartment building. The elevator is too slow for him; he bounds up the stairs to the top floor, not even feeling winded as he raps on the door and slowly opens it.

The girl is sitting on the couch staring ahead rather blankly. It's better than Kaito expected and he feels momentarily relief as he strides over to the girl. There were days when she just wasn't well, he could tell it in her speech, her movement, her eyes, and if he checked up on her later on those days, he would usually find her curled up in a corner with all the lights off, flinching at every sound he made. There didn't seem to be a particular trigger to her 'sick days', nor any pattern. Every couple of days he would just notice that she was more jumpy than usual. That disquiet would work its way out later, as she whimpered and shook on the wooden floor.

He enters her field of vision just quiet enough to not startle her, but loud enough that she knows he's there. Her eyes glance up to meet his, instantly falling back down and filling with the strange guilt she seemed to get sometimes when he found her like this. She has a blanket wrapped around her fragile frame and is quietly tensed. When Kaito sits down next to her, she doesn't move.

He still has no idea what goes on inside that mind of hers while she's like this, what she's thinking of, what memories could make her so afraid. He often can't come up with a thing to say – a group of words that portray how he felt; the strange compassion and protectiveness he felt for this girl who he had really only met six months ago. They just tended to sit there, sometimes holding hands, until the worst of it passed. Kaito did not know if his presence helped her in any way through whatever it was she was fighting, but if nothing else it helped him. He would never have been able to forgive himself if he left the girl alone while she seemed to be on the verge of falling apart.

Kaito glances over at Miku. Her hands are clenched together in a handshake with herself so tight her fingers begin to turn purple. He murmurs her name quietly once, twice, warning her that she's hurting herself. She doesn't even blink. Reaching over, he takes her wrists and gently pulls the hands apart, wincing at the fear that flashes through her eyes at the restraining action. He reassuringly put his own hands in hers, beginning to regain color. For a while her fingers are limp in his grasp, before slowly tightening and constricting around his digits as she had her own. Her grasp is like thin ropes binding around his skin. After a while she releases her hold, hands once again limp.

Kaito spoke softly, "I told you if you weren't feeling well to call me." She takes three deep breathes before responding.

"You…you were going to come anyway," she stumbles over her words as if sleepy.

He leans in towards her downturned face and whispers intensely, "I would've come sooner." She shakes her head.

"No."

He furrows his eyebrows, suddenly feeling very disordered. "Do…you not want me to come?" Her eyes widen and she shakes her head with more force, looking very distraught. "Then what is the problem?" There's no response from the girl, but there doesn't need to be. Kaito thinks he understands.

_'I'm a mistake'_

She doesn't feel worthy of kindness. His fists clench and he's reminded that the two of them are still connected. He transfers both of her tiny hands into one palm and reaches up with the other one to grip her on the arm. "When I come here," he begins, feeling her muscles tense under his hand. "Does it make you any better?" There is an immeasurable stretch of time where they both just breathe and the wheels are visibly whirling inside Miku's feverish head.

"Yes."

"Then I'll come." She bites her lip, seeming about to argue. "Don't worry about it," he cuts her off. She lowers her gaze again and sighs.

"Thank you," she whispers. Kaito smiles in pleasant surprise and cups the back of her teal head with one hand.

"Anytime."

* * *

Alone, alone. The blanket. Not the same. Empty. Alone.

Alone?

A voice. A warm hand prying apart her fingers and stopping the pain she didn't even realize she was causing. Blue hair. A smile.

There's something there. It's not empty anymore. The darkness pulls back when something's there.

"Anytime."

To not be alone.

This man is…

* * *

**A/N: **For anyone who's wondering, Kaito's issue is not like Miku's in it's dynamic. Miku, from what I can tell, would be considered as having post-traumatic stress disorder (And a little of an inferiority complex too). Certain things trigger fear and she has flashbacks and periods of unexplainable anxiety. It's a very loud obvious problem, full of tears and breakdowns. Kaito's is different. It's quiet and hidden and just plain sad. You'll understand soon.

Okay! Prologue done! Prepare for action!


	6. Chapter 6: Side Effects

**Chapter 6: Side Effects**

The boy trudges home from school and opens the door to his adopted home, the smell of roasting meat reaching his nostrils. He sticks his head in the kitchen and sees his aunt busily making dinner while writing checks and talking on the phone. She spins around and waves at him sunnily. "How was your day?" she chirps and then turns back to the handset.

"Fine," the boy responds in a tone that expressed the opposite. The lady isn't paying attention though, she just smiles and nods, spinning back to her mashed potatoes. Furrowing his eyebrows, the boy wanders around the house. His uncle is out working. The only other person around is his cousin; a _girl._

Up in his room he can hear the chatter of a phone conversation and the whir of egg beaters, distorted through the wood of the floor.

His day had not been 'fine'. It had been like most every other day before it. He had been alone. He sat through morning classes alone, ate lunch alone, and then spent recess alone. There were people there with him, teachers and other little boys, but they seemed to not notice him. As if he was a wraith, or some other different being, the kids shied away from him. The teachers had enough on their minds without a secluded little kid coming up to them and asking for a hug.

Despite the tears that he can feel beginning to gather in the backs of his eyes, he does not run to that lady or anyone else. Those sounds downstairs are the sounds of a busy woman. A busy family. There's no one, no one who wants to hear you.

He locks the door with shaking fingers, muffles his voice and cries.

* * *

Miku leans against the side of a building and sighes. She had gotten to the corner before Kaito and had decided to wait there instead of going on without him. Although her night had been pleasantly restful, she could feel the beginnings of fear creeping up into her slowly and darkly, like mold up the side of a murky well. She would be fine by herself for a while, but all the same…

"Mikuuuuuuuu~!" The startled girl spins to the sound at her right and catches sight of Rin Kagamine flying down the sidewalk towards her, arms outstretched. She slams into her with the force of a bullet and Miku would've fallen over if not for Rin's tight embrace. She bites her lip as the girls arms bore down onto her still healing bruises and delicate skin, but the hug is quickly over and the blonde is just bouncing up and down excitedly.

"We're back!"

"Welcome back…" Miku congratulates her weakly, bracing herself to run for it if Rin tries to hug her again. However, she just keeps smiling with a grin so large it seems like it may split her face in two.

"We're having a get-together tonight to celebrate our latest album!" she screeches. "At the club!" Miku blinks in surprise. A club? Is Rin even old enough to go to one of those?

Before she can question the younger girls' intentions a paper is shoved into her hands. She looks down at it, noting the RSVP stamp at the bottom. An invitation.

"Tell Kaito to come too! I've got to hand the rest of these out!" Rin yells as she dashes off. Miku tries to call after her, ask her about this, question her sanity, but the girl doesn't seem to hear. Looking past her, Miku can see said boy turn onto the street, stopping for a moment at the sight before him. Rin runs past him, a blur of flaxen hair and creamy skin, and he strides up to Miku while still looking over his shoulder.

"What was that?"

Miku just sighs.

* * *

Music blasts from the inside of the building Kaito and Miku stand before. The windows are blacked out with spray paint, but flashes of light still shine through the covering. Many cars fill the parking lot – the result of Rin's indiscriminate invitations – and people flow in and out of the club continuously.

Kaito groans and pulls at the collar of his black button-down. "Why does Rin feel the need to do this?" Miku stares ahead of them at the double doors.

"I'm sorry for getting us dragged into this," she says quietly. The girl is dressed in a grey-blue ruffled skirt with dark thigh-high leggings leaving only an inch of her whitish legs showing. Her shirt is scoop necked with the usual long sleeves she wears; her hair is pulled into a decorative tangle on the side of her head. Kaito can only marvel in how she managed to dress for the occasion, keep herself completely covered, _and_ look positively stunning as well.

"Nothing to apologize for," he corrects her quickly. "When Rin puts her mind to something, it's going to happen. Clubs just…aren't my thing."

Miku is quiet for a moment and then lids her eyes slightly. "I don't like them much either."

As the doors open once more and he catches a glimpse of the churning chaos within he smiles with the strength of patient suffering. "Let's just go in and show our support, alright? Then we can leave." The girl nods, relieved, and they step forward, entering a world of noise and light.

* * *

Kaito's plan for a quick in-and-out fails completely, for as the two of them enter the mass of swirling bodies with was the club, a couple too engrossed in each other to notice bystanders fling themselves between them. Kaito darts to the side, looking around to grab Miku and keep them together, but it is too late. After just two seconds of being in the party they are separated by walls of limbs and screaming fans.

Wandering around to try and find either Miku or the twins, Kaito stumbles through waves of dancing people and dodges waiters wading through the madness with trays of drinks. He can hear Rin's voice wailing through the speakers – occasionally accompanied by Len – but seems unable to find where she actually is.

The disorderly chaos of music of movement dances in front of Kaito's eyes and he's reminded once again why he hates clubs. There is simply too much going on. How can one enjoy themselves and dance when they have to be constantly wary of drunkards coming up and puking on them? Gakupo had taken him to one or two when they had come of age, but Kaito had never seen the attraction his friend did.

He pushes his way out of the throng and leans against the wall, wiping sweat off his brow. He surveys the shifting dancers and winces as too-high notes screech through his ears. After a moment he feels a tugging on his sleeve and turns to see Len. His hair is hanging disorderly from its short ponytail and he sags with the air of someone with too much on their mind. Over Rin's blaring singing he hears Len greet him and thank him for coming.

"_Yeah!"_ he shouts back into the boy's ear. "_Looks like you got quite a crowd!"_ Len nods almost ruefully and stares across the sea of heads.

"_I don't know why she invited so many people!"_ he yells. Kaito pats the poor guy on the shoulder. It must be quite a job keeping up with Rin's wild antics and making sure she doesn't wind up destroying whatever building they're in.

"_Well, congrats on the new album! Tell her I said so!" _Len nods and moves off just as Kaito remembered he meant to ask him to look for Miku.

Deciding not to brave the crowd again, Kaito moves carefully along the perimeter of the room, scanning the heads for a mass of teal hair. Craning his head, he catches sight of Rin and Len on some sort of stage up ahead, being flooded by fans and dancing intensely to the beat of their wild music.

A hand grips his arm. Looking over he meets the sight of Miku, looking thoroughly battered by the recklessness of the crowd. She yells something at him, her grasp growing ever tauter, but he can't hear her subtle voice over the roar of the festivity. He takes the hand that holds his arm and clutches it tighter than anything in his life as he tows her towards the door and outside.

The crisp air outdoors is like a medicine to Kaito's head buzzing with the overwhelming activity of the club. With ears ringing and eyes readjusting to the darkness, he turns back to Miku. She's breathing rather heavily, cheeks flushed from the heat of the crowd; her hand still clutches his tightly.

"Hey," he says reaching up to move a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She doesn't move, not even in fright of his touch. Her eyes stay trained low, gaze far away.

"I'm leaving," she said vacantly. Kaito nods, very much agreeing, and began to hail a taxi.

* * *

"Will you be okay by yourself?"

"I'll be fine. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Miku."

The door shuts with click. Miku stands facing it, hand still on the knob. She hears his footsteps retreat down the hallway. The moment the sound dies her knees give out from under her, both at once, and she slides to the floor, resting her head against the door. She breathes in and out, trying to flush out the memories that pour into her mind like a swarm of angry bees. It's no use though; her light is gone, she has no strength anymore.

The flashing lights, the blaring music, the hot breath. It was in a place like that. That's where she met him. A lifetime ago, that's where the ending began.

* * *

A tiny boy sits on the floor of his living room; hot tears run down his face as he rubs his head. He had been crawling underneath the coffee table, reaching for a toy, when he lifted his head suddenly and banged it against the underside of the wood. A small lump was beginning to form on the top of his skull and he bawled louder and louder.

The boy's mother charges into the room, scooping the boy into her arms and murmuring soft words of comfort. She clears away hair, planting small kisses on the sore spot.

"It's okay sweetie," she consoles and wipes away his tears. "Mommy has you." He nuzzles thankfully into her warm arms and she wraps herself around her child, sitting down on the sofa.

"It's okay, just call Mommy when something bad happens. Mommy will always listen to you…" She kisses his forehead and the boy gives a small giggle through his sobs.

"Oh, I love you so much…"

* * *

The ring of a phone shocks Kaito awake. He blinks sleepily and glances at the clock. 2:13. Shaking the remainders of his dream away, he reaches for the handset and answers groggily.

"Hello?" There's no reply. He repeats the word again, growing irritated, and is about to put the receiver down when the tiniest of voice filters out of the speaker.

"…K-Kaito?"

He sits bolt upright, all tiredness gone. "Miku?" The line is silent for a moment and he waits anxiously. A few seconds later the phone starts beeping, indicating that the call has been dropped.

He throws himself out of bed and races down the stairs. The voice on the phone mixing with the voices in his mind, he slips on shoes, grabs his coat and keys, and heaves the door open, beginning his sprint through the night city.

* * *

**A/N: **My updates might come a little slower (as in one every other day) because I just got a ton of schoolwork dumped on me. I feel like Kaito in that past chapter...

So many hints! This chapter turned out a little weird; I think I tried to make too much happen too fast, but I'm getting a little tired of how slow the first few chapters have been. The next part is great though so keep reading!


	7. Chapter 7: Illume

**A/N:** Oh my gosh, why did this turn out so well? Why can't I write like this all the time? The wonders of late nights I guess...

Anyway, this is the turning point in the story! Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 7: Illume**

She leans against the column, watching various indecently dressed people swing and grind to the beat of none too innocent music. She really wasn't supposed to be in here – she was only 17 – but the manager had a particular soft spot for her, and pretty much any other single high school girl.

She sighs, the stress and anger inside of her being somewhat dulled by the overwhelming atmosphere. A flash of brightness to her right catches her eye and she glances over, seeing a boy perhaps a little older than her saunter over and lean one hand on the pole. His hair is a startling silver-white; it's what had captured her attention. He holds himself with a self-assured and rugged air as if he didn't really care whether she wanted a conversation or not. He was going to talk to her either way.

"Here you are again," he murmurs with an undertone to his voice that she can't read. She stares at him, wondering what he means by that statement.

"Have you seen me before?" she asks. He chuckles and straightens up.

"You come to this place every once in a while. Of course I noticed you; you're meant to be noticed. But I guess you haven't seen me." The girl feels her face heat up at the not too deeply hidden compliment and looks away, trying to change the topic.

"I drop by when I've got something on my mind. Home life isn't so good, you know?" He laughs again.

"Yeah, I get that." He lowers his head to her shorter height and matches her gaze. He is heterochromatic, with one blue and one green eye, both of which hold an alluring sense of danger and life that the girl is not used to seeing. Around her house everything is progress. Perfection and progress.

"Why don't we forget about it for a while, huh?" She blinks in surprise and he smiles, gesturing his head out to the dance floor. The music resonates around the room, beating at the problems of her life with bass guitars and chords. An energy surges up within her - an anger, a desperate release of those feelings – she grabs the white haired stranger and pulls him out to the dance floor.

* * *

Fuzziness envelops the world, switching back and forth from dream to memory to the dark room Miku is actually in. The images flicker by too fast to make sense, words overlapping in her ears, thoughts and feelings stumbling over each other and crashing into one gigantic train wreck. But it doesn't stop there, they keep piling up, spasms of terror and anguish splitting the air one after the other. No room to recover, recuperate.

_Stupid girl, worthless, you never can do anything, mistake, little slut, always running away, _

She blinks, wanting to reach up and wipe away the water in her eyes, but she can't move. Her vision wavers, the room shadowy and dark, then to a different one, someone stands above her. She flinches back, but the scene changes again. There's yelling, a piece of paper, red pen marks.  
Although she cannot tell where she is, who she is, her head splits in pain as if she's fifty feet underwater and her stomach clenches and contracts on pushpins. She's nowhere now, plain darkness, lying someplace cold and hard, unable to move.

'_You don't do anything.'_ There's a throbbing pain in her wrists; she can feel the blood being cut off.

'_I expected something from you, something good, but look, this is all you are.' _She feels more blows across her wraithlike body, agony blooming from where intangible hands grab and hit. She tries to open her mouth, scream, move to defend herself or at least touch her wounds, but she can't. Semi-conscious desolation and torment moves over her, lulling her into a perturbed obscurity filled with echoes of hatred and scorn, misery and hurt.

_Miku._

The word is mixed into all the others, all the movies of her life replaying like a demented cassette tape, but it stands out, stays for longer than the others, sending out ripples like a drop of rain into a pond. It moves outward, expanding against the limitless ocean of her mind, but it's still there, still visible.

A feeling too. A touch. Only for a moment. A hand. A warmth.

_Miku._

She turns towards it and is blinded. Instead of darkness there is a light. A light too strong. It burns at her skin and sears her eyes. A radiance beyond comprehension that lets her move, but terrifies her. She put her hands in front of her roasting eyes and turns away, screaming. The darkness is there, steady and cold. Predictable.

_'Pathetic.'_

Yes. Yes it is true. She is pathetic. She had seen light, she had seen happiness, and it was too much for her. Every day it had been too much for her. She could not handle it. She could at least bear this though. This was normal. Steady, continuous, it's what she deserves.

_But it's so dark._

She releases a gasp of pain as two hot clasps grab her, lifting her from what she realizes is the floor. The touch is like the burn of an iron and she struggles away, but the clasps hold her, pulling her closer to their source and she is suddenly pressed against a blinding wall of fire. She cries out again, feeling her eyes fill with tears and her skin peel away, layer after layer.

_Miku, it's okay._

Hot gasps escape her mouth, and she opens her eyes, nearly shutting them again against the radiance. The thing, it's warm. The light is warm and comforting, like a blanket after a day in the rain.

"Miku, please."

Her eyes widen at the voice – a real voice – that she hears. It's familiar. Soft and gentle as a spring day. Very slowly the light begins to retreat into the surroundings, into her, losing its luster but not its strength, and she can see again. She can feel where she gripped her arms tight enough to draw blood and can see the spot on the floor, wet with her tears, where she lay for hours. She can feel other hands on her arms and back, feel her face pressed against something. She can hear too.

"Miku." The dye of the light vanishes completely, leaking from the room into the beings in it. Shakily she blinks, washing the last of the water down her cheeks, and pulls backward just enough to glance up and see his face.

His eyes have been closed too, in concentration, in fear for her, stress lines appearing at the edges. At her movement, he opens them, revealing deep pools of blue filled with fretfulness and distress. He smiles weakly at her, relieved at seeing some vague awareness in her expression, and raises a finger to wipe her wet cheeks.

"Miku, are you there?" He whispers hoarsely. She waits a few moments, shuddering, shivering, feeling her fearful sweat cool, and then leans back in, into the sun, into the fire.

"I'm here."

He sighs, exhaling a sound like an ancient wind. His arms hold tightly around her, her face crammed into his chest. There's no sound, she's too stunned to make one. There's a sense of calm surrounding her; the light leaking out pleasantly to warm the cold room and defrost her mind. She recognizes it. This is his feeling; this was how he could make her feel. It is the feeling of sitting alone and having someone pull out a chair next to you. It is the feeling of walking out of a classroom and seeing him there. It is the feeling of frantically struggling through a loud crowd and spotting a head of blue hair. It is the feeling that was his and his alone.

She reaches under his arms and up his back, hands clawing at the fabric of shirt, trying to pull herself closer to him. Unable to cry anymore, pants pour out of her, wild gasping and desperate clutching. He tightens too in response, closing any space between them and leaving her breathing around the edge of his chest. Yes, she knows this feeling. This warm healing sensation. She knows it will disappear the moment he does.

"D-Don't…" she bites her lip. She hadn't meant for the word to be said out loud.

He tenses for a second, expecting more. When nothing comes, he sighs and moves his head to whisper in her ear, "Whatever it is, say it." She shutters for a moment, breath coming too fast to use, and he strokes her back soothingly. "Just say it."

"D-Don't," she starts again, eyes closing in fearful anticipation. "Don't leave." He is silent and she is unable to see his face, pressed up against him like she is. "It's o-only you," she stutters, filling the empty space, feeling the tension growing inside her every second. "I can't breathe, I can't think, I can't…can't…not without you." Slowly he pulls her back from him and locks her gaze with his own, dark eyes half-lidded and mouth slightly open.

She feels the trepidation, the guilt, but she pushes it away. He said she could call him anytime. Anytime she needed him. Well, she needed him all the time. Every single moment.

"Please," she whispered. "Please don't leave me."

His face breaks apart with an almost painful expression and he pulls her in again, smoothing her hair down her back and wrapping an arm around her waist. His hands shake with the movement, and he says very quietly, very shakily, but determinedly, in a voice that portrays that he has always been waiting for her to ask, "I won't."


	8. Chapter 8: Household

**Chapter 8: Household**

Kaito groans as he sits up in bed, feeling as if he should sleep three hours more. Sunlight filters in through the one large window in his bedroom and casts the room in a golden morning glow. Outside he can hear a few birds chirping; the beginning of spring.

With a yawn, he pushes himself out of the mattress and strides around the room, getting ready for the day. He pulls open his door, entering the hallway, and begins to go into the room directly across from his own.

The door slides open soundlessly and he catches sight of a figure curled up on an air mattress in the corner of the study. Long cyan hair falls around her, her face buried in a heavy blanket. Kaito softly shuts the door, the events of last night flooding over him.

_'Please don't leave me.'_

_'I won't.'_

He remembered arriving at the loft in the dead of night and creeping across the floorboards to where Miku lay on her side near the wall. Her eyes had opened and closed but they did not see. Small sounds escaped from her mouth, pleas, yelps of pain, but the whole time she had not moved in a significant way. Shivers racked her body, but that was all. It was like watching someone have a nightmare but not being able to wake them up.

'_It's only you.'_

She was screaming as he held her, fighting against something as if it were hurting her. Her tears that fell on his hands burned like acid, her sobs a piece of ice wedged in his chest. She was alone. So alone. No one was there to hear her cry and she was not brave enough to call out.

_There's no one, no one who wants to hear you._

He had said it, and he had meant it. He would never leave her again.

* * *

Miku watched as the professor scratched equations across the chalkboards, trying to focus all her attention on the lesson. Too much had happened last night and it sent feelings flying around in a constant whirlpool, drumming against the inside of her head and leaving her breathless.

The darkness; the room that was haven during the day, but an abyss at night; the emptiness; the loneness; the fear; the indecision; the fingers hovering inches away from the phone, too uneasy to reach further; does this mean it will come to an end? Always being near him - the strange man that gives off warmth just as a sun does - will that make it all go away?

The bell rings and she's snapped out of her focus, the teacher quickly assigning homework. She sighs. Her attempts at focusing had failed; she has no idea what the lesson had been about. She bundles up her books and steps outside, glancing around anxiously for the man. Though when he arrives, Miku knows that she won't be able to think of a thing to say to him.

After a few moments of being shoved around by passerbys, a figure breaks through the crowd and leans against the wall with her, standing just so as to shield her from the traffic. He smiles and gestures down the hallway towards the cafeteria. It's too loud to hear the exact words he mutters, but she gets the meaning and nods, starting down the corridor, Kaito trailing after her.

The lunchroom is the same earsplitting pandemonium as any other day with students milling around, chatting with friends, and shooting water bottle guns at each other when nobody's watching. Kaito leads her through the chaos by one hand to the table where their friends sit. Meiko gives a military salute and Rin halts her attempt at putting ribbons in Len's hair as they approach. Luka bites into an apple thoughtfully.

"Hey, Miku!" Rin chirped as Miku took a chair, Kaito seating himself next to her. "It's great to see you here!" The twins and Meiko both have heavy shadows under their eyes and seem rather burned out despite their warm welcome to the two of them, and Miku remembers with a start that their wild party was really only last night.

"Did you sleep at all?" Kaito asks, looking slightly amused. Rin shakes her head enthusiastically. Len just sighs.

"It went on until five in the morning," Meiko announced proudly. "And I stayed there for all of it." Kaito raise his eyebrows and glances at Luka. Her expression makes it clear that, no, she had not gone, nor had she wanted to.

Talk continues circulating around the table for the lunch hour, with Miku mostly staying quiet and listening. About halfway through the meal she notices Meiko staring at her peculiarly, or more exactly, at her hands. She glances down, worried that perhaps her sleeves had slid back a bit too far, but only sees her turkey sandwich clutched between her fingers. After a few months of enduring the noxious school food, Kaito had decided that he would rather take the time to pack his own lunch than go hungry or be poisoned by 'mystery meat'. This morning, he had made her one as well.

She discreetly checks over the roll, making sure there isn't some sort of mold that she hadn't seen, but finds nothing. It's just a sandwich. She glances up, gathering her courage and meaning to ask Meiko what she was gawking at, but the woman had already looked away.

* * *

The walk from school is quiet, with neither Miku nor Kaito being able to figure out a way to start a conversation. Miku's stomach churns as she realizes that it was Friday and they had a whole weekend of secluded awkwardness ahead of them. Upon reaching the house, Kaito pulls out a key and whips open the door, dropping his bag and shoes in the front room.

Miku gazes around. In the daylight his house looks much different than it had last night as she stumbled in, bags in one hand, Kaito holding the other and guiding her up the stairs. The house is modern, with cream colored walls and metallic furnishings. The front room has a door leading to the kitchen off to the left and a small archway leading into the living room, where white leather sofas bask in the light of floor to ceiling windows covering one wall. A small spiral staircase leads to the upper floor which consists of a bedroom, bathroom, and office room.

"Do you want something to drink?" Miku snaps her head around to the voice. Kaito leans out the doorway of the tiny kitchen. She nods and follows him in there, taking in the surrounding of the room. The room is wide but short, with appliances lining one wall; a small set of table and chairs is crammed against the opposite. With walls the color of sunflowers and a white curtained window, the room has a distinctly feminine feel to it that Miku finds rather confusing seeing how this is, after all, a man's home.

In fact, the entire existence of this house is rather odd. Being a college student, Kaito should only be surviving monetarily by the skin of his teeth, but somehow he owns a house and seems to have enough money to take a random girl under his wing as well. Something doesn't add up.

Noticing her thoughtful expression Kaito smiles, urging her to say whatever's on her mind. Miku reddens and glances out the window, wondering why it is that he always seems to pick up her every thought. He turns back to the cabinets, reaching for a cup, his interest still hanging in the air.

"How…do you have a place like this?" Her question is vague at best, but Kaito seems to understand its meaning instantly. His hand stops midway to its destination. Miku bites her lip and takes a step back, certain that she's asked something that she shouldn't have, that she's made him angry, but when he turns to her his face holds only his usual unruffled smile.

"My parents left me this house, along with all of their other assets," he says in a voice as smooth as the surface of a lake. Miku stares for second before lowering her head.

"I'm sorry…" she begins, not understanding what else to say in a situation like this. He coolly waves a hand at her and goes back to his task.

"Ancient history, Miku. They died a long time ago."

Miku blinks a couple of times, surprised at his collected response. It should've been a sensitive topic, one that at least brought back a melancholy quality to him, but he had brushed it off like water off a ducks back. To lose your parents, especially at a young age, would be a grief that stayed with you forever, so why was he able to just shut down the subject like that?

As she watches his back, moving with the actions of his arms, Miku realizes that she rarely ever saw Kaito upset. His voice was calm and cool, his actions measured, no matter how anyone pushed his buttons he never showed anger or hurt. The only time he had ever cried had been for her.

Those tears had been silent, as if he would not allow himself to make a sound.

* * *

**A/N:** So it continues! The reveal of Kaito's 'Big Bad Secret' (Which may be a disappointment to you guys expecting him to be bipolar or a rape victim or something; it's seriously not like that.) is coming up!

Oh, and I think this will wind up being about twenty chapters. I've got a lot of work...


	9. Chapter 9: Let-Slip

**Chapter 9: Let slip**

"Hurry up!" yells the boy's friend as they run through the streets of the city. "The park stops letting in people in fifteen minutes!" The boy sprints as fast as his little legs could carry him, running after the flashes of purple and pink hair ahead of him. The ice cream man was back and rumor was that he was going around the park giving out free samples of everyone's favorite flavors. This is not an opportunity to miss.

The kids skid to a halt as the crosswalk light turns red. The purple haired boy stomps his foot impatiently. "Lame!" He yells and spins around, looking for a quicker way to reach their destination. He points towards a staircase descending below the street and runs towards it, sneaking between the legs of unwitting adults. The other two chase after him, down the stairs and wind up in an underground train station. The boy halts, his eyes spreading wide, but his friend grabs him, pulling him into the train.

They only remember once the doors close. They stare at him with horror, as if expecting him to break into a million pieces. He does not. He just smiles at them and holds onto the pole as the car shakes and screeches down the tracks. He doesn't cry out. He doesn't tense up. He doesn't say a word.

But the inside of him is curling in terror, sobbing in grief, howling in anger.

No sound.

Shivering, crying, screaming,

_Screaming._

Kaito sits bolt upright in his bed, his head spinning in the direction of the hallway. The room is pitch black, the only light coming from his digital clock which reads around five in the morning. He blinks his unseeing eyes, ears pricked for the sound that had awoken him. After a few seconds of ringing silence he hears it again; a whimper, muffled but definitely a sound of someone in distress.

He tears the covers off of himself and, after a thought, pulls on a shirt, before slipping out into the hallway and knocking on the study door lightly. There's a small sound from inside and he slowly opens the door, stepping inside.

The interior of this room is black as well and Kaito feels around through the obscurity. His foot reaches forward and taps the edge of something plastic that gives under his force. The bed.

"Miku?" he whispers unbelievably quietly "Are you awake?" He feels the weight shift on the inflated plastic.

"Yes." The voice is shaky but very alert. He hadn't woken her.

Slowly he lowers himself down onto the bed, feeling around to make sure he doesn't sit on her. Once seated, he reaches out slowly, groping through the darkness for the form of the girl. His hand rubs something loft and soft; her hair, let loose and down around her shoulders. He senses her tense, and then feels her hand reach up and touch his own. She moves towards him, clasping his hand, his arm, until her breathing is right next to his. Her head rests on his shoulder and he reaches his other arm around to hold her.

"I woke you…" she whispers. Her eyebrows furrow against his shoulder and wetness begins to leak into his shirt.

"You were supposed to," he argued "That was the whole point of moving." There's silence and she sighs, releasing his arm to simply lean against him. After a moment he rests his head on her own, feeling her heartbeat calm the longer he's there, and stares forward into the black, watching as the sky slowly lightens outside the window.

* * *

Miku sits quietly on the white couches, gazing out the large windows into the house's small backyard. Grass has begun to spring up across the lawn, violets and dandelions dotting the green every few feet. Above the wooden fence surrounding the lawn the sky is a pale yellow-blue, alight with the color of a newly risen sun.

Her dreams had been different. There was no pain, just an odd emptiness, a sadness and confusion she couldn't have explained. She had woken chocking on tears and let a cry escape before covering her mouth. She lay there, alone in dark, wondering, debating on whether or not to take the action she so needed. But she hadn't had to decide, a few moments later the door had opened and a soft voice called out to her. He had heard her.

Footsteps alert her and she turns her gaze, falling on Kaito striding out of the kitchen, a steaming cup of coffee in both hands. He sits down with a small smile and holds out the mug to her. The warmth of the liquid seeps into her hands through the ceramic, her eyelids perking upward considerably as the caffeine works its way through her system. Kaito reclines next to her, not saying a word, his eyes strangely far away. Miku feels something stir inside her at the sight. Basked in the morning light, his profile looked principled and levelheaded, a tenseness lying just underneath the calm expression he always wore.

His head turns to her, sensing once again an unasked question. She looks away, trying to figure out how to put into words the odd intuition she was beginning to feel about him. His gaze stays on her, unrelenting; he never would let her keep quiet, would he?

She bites her lip, taking a breath. Words bubble to the surface, disorganized and confused. Her mouth opens and she feels his gaze on her, intense, somehow aware that something serious was about to be said.

"Kai-" her words are cut off as a click and creak sounds from the front room. Both spins their heads around, staring in shock as a figure breezes into the room, observing the two of them and moving her hands to her hips.

"What is this?" Meiko exclaims, eyeing Kaito suspiciously. "What's going on here?" The boy quickly jumps up, hands waving frantically. Miku shies back further into the cushions.

"It's not what you think," he says and then pauses for a moment. "Probably," he finishes with a frown. Meiko glances at Miku, curled up on the couch in shock and continues on with an appalled tone.

"Then what is it?" she asks. "Having her here at six in the morning, what the heck is this?"

"I could ask you the same thing," Kaito retaliates. "Just because you have a key doesn't mean you should barge into other people's houses at the crack of dawn." Meiko folds her arms and stares at him, a mixture of concern and crossness painting her features.

"I had a hunch," she stated, glancing over at Miku with an unreadable expression. "Your lunches yesterday were identical; why would that be unless the same person made them?" Miku clenches a pillow. _That's_ what she had been staring at during lunch.

Kaito stands, helpless ambivalence written across his posture. There's an explanation, of course there is, but he wouldn't say it. He _won't_ say it. It's not his to tell.

"He's helping me," Miku blurts out in a voice still crackly from sleep. Meiko turns to her, confusion evident in her eyes. Miku swallows, trying to find the courage to say more.

"I was in trouble. I couldn't stay at…my house," she whispers, feeling two pairs of eyes burning into her. Her throat is dry and her hands begin to shake. Why is talking so hard? It feels as if needles are jutting into her throat. "Kaito, he's…he's letting me stay here." She concludes lamely. The room is silent for a moment. After a moment, a chuckle breaks the air. Miku whips her head up to the sight of Meiko suddenly exploding with laughter. She watches in astonishment and glances at Kaito questioningly. The man simply stares with an air of mild exasperation.

"And I thought that he was keeping you penned up in here like some kind of perverted warden!" Her laughter dies down and she sighs. She strides over to Miku and leans over her, completely ignoring the heavy sigh of her cousin. Her red-brown eyes are alight with an odd emotion, yet dark with sincerity and care.

"That's good," she murmurs, surprising Miku with her apparent relief. "You'll be safe here, alright? Kaito is most reliable guy I've ever met." Miku blinks a couple times glancing over at said boy. His expression has returned to carefully controlled neutrality; she can't tell what he thinks of this statement. Meiko leans down further and whispers mutedly so that the sound barely reaches her ears.

"And you don't have to be afraid of him either. I bet even Len has more testosterone than he does." Miku feels her face blush bright red and pushes out a startled 'yes' as Meiko pulls away. The girl chuckles once at her expression and turns back to her cousin.

"Do you want to stay for breakfast?" Kaito sighs, sounding very tired. Meiko shakes her head.

"Nope. Got plans. I really just headed by to make sure my little Kai-Kai wasn't up to anything." Kaito stares blankly at the nickname and nods, glancing nervously at Miku as if to make sure that Meiko hadn't hurt her in some way. Meiko leans into Kaito's ear as she had Miku's and whispers in the same hushed tone. Miku realizes with a start that she could pick up the words in the silence of the room, and her faces flushes redder still.

"Take care of her, you hear?" Meiko murmurs. "If any bit of trouble befalls that girl," her hand reaches forward and clenches menacingly. "_I'll snap your frickin head off."_ Kaito is silent for a moment before slowly nodding. Miku cannot see his face. Considering the conversation sufficient, Meiko spins around with a cheerful wave, completely disregarding the murderousness she exhibited a moment ago and leaves the way she came.

They stare after her for a moment until Kaito slowly turns back to Miku, his gaze measured and his voice soothing. "You alright?" Miku realizes that she is still backed into the corner of the couch, clenching a pillow desperately. She nods vigorously and loosens her grip. The man sits down again with a sigh and sips at his cooled coffee. Miku watches him again, the side of his face, cool and collected, with a hint of something underneath, like a flicker of movement behind a dark window.

His thoughts are further away than when Meiko barged in, off somewhere, hidden behind of mask of calm.

_A reliable guy_

_He could have been messed up_

Miku blinked as the face in front of her slowly warped, changing, revealing itself as she thought and reflected and probed. The attitude that had seemed so steady was filled with numb restraint; the unruffled curve of his mouth a deep line of exhaustion; the gaze filled with soft comfort and gentleness suddenly becoming deep oceans filled with unappeasable sadness.

He sat there in front of her, the same yet different, her vision growing clear for just a moment and seeing underneath the politeness, the coolness that he wore like a shield. She reaches out thoughtlessly, her hand grazing his arm. He turns to her surprised and the image vanishes, his being once again composed.

"What is it?" he asks quietly. She stares at him for a second, trying to decipher, to see again, but she can't, the armor is back on. She shakes her head lightly and looks away, and for once Kaito doesn't question her.

* * *

**A/N: **Uhg...I have been so uninspired lately. Keep writing...

Anyway, lots of hints about Kaito in this one too! Keep reading!


	10. Chapter 10: Calm Before The Storm

**Chapter 10: Calm Before The Storm**

Kaito leans against the side of a vegetable stand, savoring the warm spring air. It is a pleasant seventy degrees with wispy silver clouds dotting the edges of the robin-egg blue sky. Sunlight pours down in just the right amount; not too hot, not too cold.

There's movement from beside him and he turns to see Miku, her arms filled with a bag of produce. The girl is so petite that even a bag of onions and tomatoes seems to overpower her. She hefts the container higher onto her hip every few seconds only to have it slip again. Kaito chuckles and takes the bag from her grasp. She blows out air crossly.

"Did you get everything you wanted?" he asks, hefting the sack in one arm. She nods and he leans down to pick up the other bag he had sat next to him. They had begun to run low on essentials at the house - it's amazing what adding another person to a household can do – and since the weather was so agreeable Kaito had declared it a shopping day and shortly strode out the door, Miku tagging interestedly behind him.

They tread down the sidewalk, a car passing them occasionally, Kaito holding the bags and Miku following, seeming rather distraught at her deficit of strength. Waiting at a red light, Kaito's gaze wanders to the other side of the street; the central park, mostly empty except for a few people playing baseball. He squints.

The light changes and they cross, Kaito wandering over to the park entrance. Gazing far into the center of the main field he follows the figure darting around and yelling. He gestures towards them and shakes his head. It seems that he can't escape these people even for a day.

With an agreeing nod from Miku the two of them stride across the fresh green grass to the place where a group of college students play an improvised game of baseball. Their friends are stationed at various places across the field on different teams; Rin pitching, Len catching, Luka on second base, and Meiko waiting on the bench to bat. Less familiar faces fill in the other positions.

Rin halts in the middle of a pitch and glances over at them. "Kaito! First base!" she proclaims without further intro. There's an unexplainable fire burning deep in her eyes and with an apologetic look towards Miku, he quickly drops the bags and runs forward, not willing to be mauled by an obviously moody Rin.

As he relieves the former player from their position Rin turns her gaze to Miku and orders her to right outfield. Kaito throws his head over to Miku, meaning to tell her that it's okay, she doesn't have to play, but the girl is simply placing the groceries under the shade before jogging over to her place. He gives her a questioning glance, worry and apprehension pricking in his chest. She can't even carry a bag of vegetables; how was she going to manage running around on a field? However she just gives an uneasy smile and shrugs. Kaito decides Rin made a good decision by putting her in the outfield.

Meiko strides up to the plate swinging a red bat menacingly. Kaito widens his stance, trying to remember what little he knew about baseball. He had played in a local team when he was in junior high, but that was a long time ago.

Rin reels back and pitches, Meiko's bat meeting the ball with a crack like lightening. The ball soars through the air and the woman runs, whipping around two bases before it is back in reach. Meiko grins at Luka as the other girl trots casually onto home.

The game continues at a breakneck pace, no one seeming to care about switching positions or batting order. Many people bat as soon as they return home since the number of players is lacking and the players in the field scramble around, trying to cover all the bases and openings. Kaito dashes and jumps, playing what is likely the most important base on field to the best of his ability. The sun rises higher in the sky and a small bit of sweat trickles down Kaito's neck as Len finally declares with a shout that the game is over. Players disperse, moving off to the cool of the trees and grass. Kaito turns around and walks to Miku in the field behind him.

The girl had fared fairly well throughout the game; the few balls that had flown back there were quickly shot back or caught by the girl, who although weak seemed to have a decent amount of hand-eye-coordination. He smiles at her and pushes bangs out of his face with one hand. She tilts her head and walks over to where the bags were left, checking if any of the food spoiled during the course of the game. Kaito follows her over and sits down under a wide spreading tree. Reassured that they hadn't just ruined the fare they bought, she leans against the trunk as well and gazes out over the same park they had visited back in the winter. They could see the clearing where they talked, surrounded by flowering cherry trees, off in the distance. They were here in the park again, together, however, the time in that clearing had been a very different occasion.

He's brought out of his rumination by the girl shifting and revealing a pant leg streaked with dirt and mud. Looking her over there are a few other places where she had dirtied herself diving for balls.

"Hey, you're all muddy," he says and reaches into a bag for a napkin. With a squirt from a fellow player's water bottle he returns to her, dabbing the cloth along the fabric of her outfit. She blinks a couple times in surprise but then relaxes, brushing the drier dirt off her arms. There's a small streak of dust along one of her cheekbones, and thoughtlessly Kaito wipes away at it, only halting at the alarmed look in her eye.

He pulls his hand back, feeling the confusion on her face painting across his own. Why had he done that? "I'm sorry," he says awkwardly, the sound coming out quieter than intended. The girl stares at him, a strange mix of emotion echoing the ones inside him floating through her features. She opens her mouth slightly, about to stay something, but closes it and instead reaches out to wipe her sleeve against his face. It trails away with a miniscule amount of dirt accumulated on it. He hadn't even noticed the grime.

He blinks twice, his hand closing tighter around the napkin. The girl says nothing more, just cleans the rest of the dirt off herself with a sleeve. She stands and grabs the bags, not meeting the man's eyes. "Should we go?"

"Y-yeah," he stutters, pulling himself up. He waves towards Luka, alerting her of their leaving. She smirks at him with an almost amused expression and waves goodbye. Kaito turns back to Miku but is startled to see that the girl has gone on ahead, struggling again with the girth of their groceries. He runs towards her, meaning to help her again, but something catches his attention.

Her hair sways in the slight breeze, teal and highlighted by the sun like the sea on a clear day. As he gets closer he swears he can smell the scent of her, the scent that lingered on his scarf so long ago and occasionally wafted about the house after she took a shower. He feels something clench inside him, a breathlessness that nearly causes him to trip. His eyes widen, he can feel every vein pumping as he reaches her side.

He grabs the bags and she looks at him again, no emotion in her features. "Let me do that," he explains and takes the items while continuing to walk. The girl stops, lowering her head and seeming confused at something, but then starts again trailing behind him. Kaito forces himself to keep an easy smile, to not startle her any more than he seems to already have. But inside him wheels are turning, doors opening that reveal disquieting shocks and emotions that he pushes down lest a scream of torment erupt from his mouth.

_No, you can't._

He glances back at the girl striding behind him, her eyes lowered to the ground, only knowing where to walk by the areas he had just stepped on. She trusts him so much.

_No. Inexcusable._

He turns back ahead and focuses on taking step after step. Step after step. He clenches his teeth, the physical pain seeming to detract from the mental turmoil washing through his mind.

_What was that just now?_

* * *

**A/N:** I bet you guys can't imagine what he was feeling. What genre was this fic again?

Anyway, I am so hyped up! The next few chapters turned out really awesome! (I post the chapter three chapters behind whatever I just wrote. Really I just finished Chap.13) As soon as I figure out how to put the climax I have so perfect in my mind into words, you'll get another update!

I continuously thank everyone reading.


	11. Chapter 11: Follow Along

**Chapter 11: Follow Along**

Dark clouds form on the horizon as Miku and Kaito return from campus. Over the week it had been increasingly hot and sunny with high humidity and large puffy thunderheads threatening every afternoon. It seems as if now is when they decided to strike.

The man stops midway unlocking the house door and frowns at the sky. Miku follows his gaze and receives a drop of water on her cheek. She wipes it off and whispers, "Looks bad." He nods and hastily opens the door, ushering her into the darkened house.

Without even taking off his shoes he begins to dodge around, locking windows and pulling chairs from the small yard inside. The wind picks up as he goes in and out the doors. He calls back, "Miku, can you fill some buckets with water?" She stops midway up the stairs and goes to him, meaning to ask where the containers would be, but is met with a sudden gush of wind through the side entrance and a flustered Kaito hurriedly slamming the door shut.

"Under the sink," he exhales and walks to the kitchen and pulls out two said buckets. "This way if the power goes we'll still have water." Miku frowns and grabs a bucket, unease prickling in her chest.

"Do you think it'll be that bad?" He sighs and turns to the sink to begin filling the container.

"I don't know, maybe." Miku waits for him to continue but he remains silent. A strange flipping feeling runs through her stomach in the muteness. Kaito had been a little off for a few days, still his usual happy and calm self, but as if he was really only half there, the rest of him lost in some not entirely pleasant realm of thought. She had asked him – as much as she could make herself that is – what was bothering him, but he just waved it off with a laugh and a topic change.

She plodded to the bathroom and began to fill the bucket at the sink. Her reflection wavers and shivers in the rippling surface of the rising water sending waves through her aquamarine eyes and the skin beneath them. The circles are lighter there, still visible against her paleness, but nonetheless receded. Her dreams are still dark, but filled more with shadows and dripping sounds that left her feeling queasy when she awoke than the flashes of red and blossoms of pain in time past. Occasionally she still shot up in the middle of the night, screaming and crying, but he was there. He was always there.

She tugs the bucket out of the sink and is instantly pulled to the ground by its weight. She gnashes her teeth, and drags the bucket across the tile before lifting it to carry across the wooden floor. Dropping it in the kitchen with a gasp, Kaito raises an eyebrow at her and chuckles softly. "You could've left it in the bathroom, you know." She stares blankly at him and he shakes his head, turning to take a few foodstuffs out of the fridge. Miku sighs softly and after a moment's thought moves into the living room and seats herself on the sofa.

The clouds have opened up now, sending an ever increasing patter of rain across the roof and yard; a fine mist rises from any hard surface as the water cools what was heated during the day. The sky darkens more and wind wails against the large windows, causing Miku to shy back from the glass with the unlikely fear that they would shatter. A while later Kaito walks over and joins her, handing her a warm mug of hot chocolate.

She sips hesitantly at the liquid, eyeing the perpetually blackening sky with muscles tensed. Kaito breathes next to her, gone again in thought. She turns her head to him and sees it again, the mask and the person underneath. His eyes are filled with a raw and yearning anguish, his hands clenched tight on the mug.

A burst of sound sends the girl jumping, Kaito reaching out to steady her. She stares at lightning setting the sky outside ablaze. The man besides her shifts, her name coming out softly. She turns and sees her hand embedded in his shirt; she had grabbed it in start. An instant reaction to fear. She looks up to meet his eyes, let go and apologize, but is halted. His expression is still open, exposing everything below. She sees ambivalence, despair, shock, loneliness, all mixed together and molded around something deeper, hotter; something she has seen before.

Her words are lost in a clap of thunder, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. She gasps, startled again, and the lights flicker out, filling the room in shadow. With a curse Kaito jumps up and away and stalks upstairs, saying he's going to get a flashlight.

Miku stands and wanders to the front room, waiting by the stairs, watching out a window at the rain and flashes of light. Her hand leans against the guardrail, her eyes half-lidding. There was something about him. Something she didn't know yet. The strange way he could push off painful things, that 'mask' he seemed to wear. That feeling, that something that had flashed through his features momentarily, was that really-?  
The front door flies open with a spatter of rain and a whirl of wet clothes. Miku takes a step back from the figure pushing the entry closed against the wind, glancing up the stairs for Kaito and around the room for something to defend herself with.

"_Hells teeth!"_ the intruder yells as he pushes sopping purple hair over his shoulder. "That was worse than the hurricane in Puerto Rico!" Turning around, his gaze falls on the girl huddled against the stairway and his eyes widen in surprise.

"_Crap_," he exclaims and sighs theatrically. "Who are you? Don't tell me this is the wrong house." Miku blinks a couple of times, not really believing the sight. The soaked and windblown gatecrasher standing before her is none other than-

"Gakupo?" Kaito's voice sounds from the stairway and both people glance up to spot him standing there in surprise, the promised flashlight in one hand. The wet man grows a wild smile and trots up to his friend, who gapes at him. Miku dimly realizes that he's dragging muddy water all over the floor.

"I have arrived at long last!" Gakupo exclaims and throws an arm around the blue haired man. "Come, let us go celebrate this momentous occasion with a round of karaoke and_ beer_!" Kaito stares at him, with only an air of good-natured distaste and embarrassment.

"Thanks for telling me you were coming," he says and tosses the lantern to Miku who catches it haphazardly. "Karaoke? You do realize it's blowing a gale, don't you?" Gakupo shrugs and raises a hand as if preaching to an unseen audience.

"Nothing short of death will halt my onward march towards endless songs and bar waitresses in lewd outfits!" He proclaims with pride and begins to pull the man towards the door. Kaito digs his feet in, suddenly seeming very alarmed. His eyes flash to Miku's.

"Dude," he argues. "I can't leave her by herself." Gakupo glances again at Miku, seeming to remember that she was there and raises his eyebrows.

"Why not?" Kaito opens his mouth angrily, about to argue, but another voice quickly interrupts him.

"Go ahead," Miku speaks up. Kaito stares at her with wide questioning eyes. She keeps her gaze level. Gakupo is Kaito's best friend – or so she had heard – and it seems as if they haven't seen each other in ages. It was one night; she would figure it out. "I'll be fine." Gakupo glances in between them doubtfully.

"Wait, you two…aren't on a date or anything, are you?" Miku feels her face flush a deep red and glimpses a inking of the color across Kaito's own cheeks as they both violently shake their heads no. Gakupo shrugs. "Alright then…_onward march!"_ He flings the door open with a dramatic wave of his hand, and Miku vaguely hears Kaito order her to call his cell if something happens before they are gone just as fast as Gakupo had arrived.

Miku waits a moment, flashlight in hand, staring at the door and listening to the drumming of rain on the roof. Lightning flashes again and she wills herself to stay calm, plodding into the living room and sitting on the couch again. Her hot cocoa has gone cold and she sips at it half-heartedly while gazing around the darkened room for something to do in the middle of a blackout.

Not finding anything to distract herself with, she coils up on the cushions and thinks. Letting herself fall into that state of mind is much like white water kayaking; she has be very careful to steer around certain areas. She'll get hurt if she goes there. Her thoughts float over school, her assignments, her classmates, the twins, Meiko, Luka, all of her new friends. Are they her friends? She decides they are. She thinks of Gakupo and his relationship with the people she knows. Meiko, Luka, and of course Kaito appeared to know him pretty well, and she somehow doubts that famous musicians with mutual friends wouldn't run into each other once in a while. He seems like an odd person, a bit overdramatic and ostentatious, but nice enough from what she had seen as he crashed through the door and whisked Kaito away.

Kaito.

She grips her empty mug. This is one of the areas she should have avoided. There's too much going on. He's too confusing; a warmhearted man with no restraints on kindness. He doesn't need to be asked, he doesn't need to rewarded. Doling out charity like it's extra change, he's a savior.

The image she has caught so rarely, of a Kaito the world never sees, flashes through her mind. A melancholy isolation, a bittersweet smile, a loneliness beyond comprehension…

A savior that needs saving?

_ "I'll see you tomorrow, right?"_

_ "I like it; you didn't do anything wrong."_

_"I'm here, are you alright?"_

_ "You don't deserve that,"_

_"I'll take care of you."_

Miku shakes her head and stand abruptly, setting down her cup and starting upstairs. She pushes the thoughts down, away, they're too much. Kindness, happiness, that thing in his eyes; it's all too much.

She breathes heavily, washing her face in the sink and not looking into the mirror. Sleep. Maybe sleep will make the thoughts go away. She wanders into the study where an air mattress is laid out for her, a book shelf cleared away for her things.

_"I care about you,"_

She closes her eyes and turns her head away.

* * *

"So, who's the girl?" Kaito glances up at his friend. He spins a microphone by the cord in one hand and puts his other on one black jean clad hip. His powder blue eyes narrowed questioningly. He had just finished a ridiculously fast song that he had sung as easily as if it was 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star'.

"A classmate," he responds nonchalantly. Gakupo tilts his head.

"Okay, why was she at your house?"

Kaito sighs, thinking. Gakupo watches him curiously. He sticks up his hand and grabs the mic, halting its rotation. The story; it's long. There's a quick explanation, a simple three words, but if he can't say them to her, what's the point of speaking them at all?

"Let me sing a bit."

* * *

**A/N**: The elusive Gakupo...is a nut case. Not literally, but I always imagined him being a little off the wall...


	12. Chapter 12: Listen

**Chapter 12: Listen**

The room is quiet, there's no one else in it besides the little boy sitting silently on the bed. Outside clouds pass over the yard as his cousin and her friend dash around. He peers out the white curtains and watches them. The young girl chases after her friend, laughing. Running faster and faster, she suddenly stumbles and sprawls across the grass, her knees scraping against the rocks. She lets out a scream of pain and her mother rushes out the front door.

The woman scoops the girl up and looks her over, talking to her consoling her, placing cute hello kitty Band-Aids over her skinned knees. She murmurs something into the girl's ear and the child laughs, her tears falling down. Her mother kisses the rest away.

His hand tightens around the fabric of the drape and he moves it closed again. Looking back around his room his eyes fall on the corner, the empty walls, the wet spot on his pillow. There was no one to run to him when he needed it. Those people, the ones that lived for him, are gone. Disappeared in a haze of fire and twisted metal.

Suddenly the room is full of noise, a cacophony of clangs and waves rush through his ears. He closes his eyes, clenching his teeth, his throat closing up.

_Don't make a sound. No one is there to hear it._

* * *

Miku's eyes flash open, blood rushing in her ears. After a moment she realizes that she isn't breathing and inhales hastily, choking on her own inhalation. She sits up, holding a hand to her pounding head. Outside, the rain is light, the thunder stopped. The clock reads around midnight.

She can't remember her dream in specifics, only feelings, cold things that feel like broken glass where her gut should be. It expands, filling her, she starts shivering, a tingling in her fingertips. She looks around the nighttime room. No lights save for the clock. Not black, but dark. Too dark.

Pulling herself up, she strides over to the door praying that Kaito has returned home by now. She rubs her bare arms – she's only wearing a cami and capri sweatpants – and gently steps across the hallway. The house is silent with the hush of night and sleep and the soundlessness seeps into her like cold water. With surprise she realizes that there is a soft light coming out from under the opposite door; Kaito's door. The power has come back, and he is using it.

She raps on the wood and slowly opens it, relieved, sticking her head inside and faltering at what she sees. The room she had only glanced into before, dominated by a large low bed, is cast in a dim golden hue from a small table lamp. The man lay spread out across his mattress, clad in an old t-shirt and pajama pants. His eyes are half-lidded, focusing on the ceiling as if all the answers to his questions are written there. He moves his head slightly towards her and she sees it again, the raw underneath.

"Miku," he whispers. She tenses at the crack in his voice. His eyes are shiny, watery, but he blinks that away. "What is it?"

Slowly she enters the room, footsteps soft on the carpet, and closes the door behind her. Her dream seems silly now; what was she afraid of? He was right here in the next room after all.

Her gaze meets his, her eyebrows furrowing in worry. His hidden feelings are barely visible, just bubbling beneath the surface, but she sees them. They are there. They always have been.

She strides over, sitting herself down on the bed. He scrambles up and stares at her, leaning on one elbow. His eyes look over her arms and shoulders, the many scars and bruises finally uncovered and shown in the dim light. He has never seen this much of her before, and although he tries to hide it, Miku can tell he's startled. She swallows, pushing that topic away. This wasn't about her. Not right now. She tries out words that usually come out of his mouth.

"Are you okay?" His eyes widen, his mouth opening marginally. After a moment he smiles.

"Of course I am, Miku." She frowns and clenches at the sheets. He didn't want her to dig further; she could tell. She hadn't wanted him to go further either. It was painful. She hadn't wanted him to know anything, to worry about her. But he had reached out. He had pulled her sleeves back. He had saved her.

"No, you're not," she says quietly. The man tenses and his smile lowers. After a moment he shakes his head.

"Don't worry about it," he whispers, looking down. The lamp casts heavy shadows across his face.

"No." He doesn't look up, just smiles gently and falsely at the bedding. She waits a moment for a response, something, anything, but nothing happens. Her hands move of its own accord, one grabbing his arm and the other his face, moving it gently to look at her.

"Every…" she begins, staring into startled blue eyes as troubled as a stormy sea. "Everyone always thinks that just because someone acts alright, they must be alright. No one ever comforts those who don't seem to need it." He stays silent as she continues, her eyes focused deep in his, finally understanding. Finally knowing what she had been seeing, who he was.

"No one ever thinks that those who help may be suffering themselves, do they?"

His eyes widen and something seems to give, letting out what he had stifled up over the years. The heartache that no one ever condoled, the crying that no one ever heard, it sneaks out in one silent tear which seems to be all the contained man can manage. Miku moves closer, slowly, and carefully extends her arms around him, thin strips of white around his shoulders. His breath hitches and he tenses for a moment, before bringing a hand up to grasp her back.

"No one wanted to know," he whispers into Miku's ear. His voice is low and gravely, as desolate as a lone bird singing in the wintertime. She lays her head on his shoulder and holds tighter. "I can't worry anyone; it's not their business." He pauses for a moment. "There's no one that wants to hear me."

Miku keeps her head down, her face hidden, so that he cannot see the tears that fall and soak into his shirt. To be alone, to have no one, to know that there's not one person you could go to, what do you do? What happens then? Those feelings, the sadness, it doesn't go away. It just curdles and festers inside you, growing more painful every day, and there's no one there. No one to push away the darkness.

She forces herself to pull back, to look at him, the man who hides his feelings. The man who is lonely, more lonely than she had ever realized, than anyone had ever realized. This feeling, this unexplainable yearning and wretchedness, is this what he feels when he sees her?

"Tell me," she breathes finally. "Tell me. I want to know. I'll worry." He pulls back, staring at her with an expression of disorientated wonder. She swallows and continues, surer every second of her words, of what she needs to do, of what _he_ needs. He needs someone. A person. Someone who will listen to him and think of him and care about him always. Somehow, he needs her.

"I want to hear you," she whispers. He looks at her with the same steady gaze as usual, but it begins to deteriorate, breaking apart, a wall falling down. He stares down at his hands lying uselessly on the coverlet, seeming at a loss.

"Talk to me," Miku urges gently. Her thoughts wander back to weeks past, alone in the loft, wanting someone, wanting him, but not being able to ask. He had taken that away, given her devotion, a warmth she had never truly felt. She had it now, but it was still lost to him, as it had been since his parents died.

Not fair, not _right_.

She won't let this go, won't let him be alone anymore.

"Talk to me."

Kaito slowly lifts his head. His eyes are filled with softness, alight with something unrecognizable. "Sorry, I…" he blinks once. "I just don't really know what to say right now," he murmurs, his voice filled with thought. The room is draped with the easy sound of falling rain. After a moment he lowers himself onto his pillows and closes his eyes.

"Could…Could you sing for me?"

Miku blinks, breathing in with surprise. She didn't consider herself as great of a vocalist as everyone praised her to be. She had never had lessons or anything, she just memorized tunes and repeated them the best she could. But he wanted to hear her. And she wanted to hear him. She'll have to be the one to start.

She gazes out the darkened window and back down at the form lying next to her. Very slowly she taps out a beat on her knee and sorts through her mind for a song.

_I add my suspended thoughts to sound_

_The present is so softly shaking_

_Picking out a blurry story_

_Is it okay if it piles up?_

_Softly close your eyes_

_And then open them suddenly_

_So that an audible sound can be heard_

_Please sing_

Miku stops halfway through her lullaby, reaching down to the bottom of the bed where the covers had been pushed. She grabs them and hauls them upwards, draping them over Kaito and her. His eyes open halfway for a moment, questioningly. He smiles, grabbing onto the sheets and pulling them close like a small child with their favorite blanket.

"Keep going."

She lowers herself and places her head on the pillow opposite him, a good two feet away. Her voice lowers, softer, smoother, drawling out the notes like a music box winding down.

_I add emotions I wished for to sound_

_The present is so softly shaking_

_I stow away blurry words_

_Isn't it alright to stop them up?_

_Softly close your eyes and _

_You'll hear your next pulse_

_Listen close and you'll be able_

_Please sing_

Her voice drifts off, escaping into the corners of the room. Kaito doesn't move other than soft rhythmic breathing and the occasional flutter of his eyelids. Miku watches, thinking, feeling, trying to make sense of her emotions towards this man. Her eyelids droop, heavy. The blanket folds comfortingly around her.

As a wave of tiredness and something else wash over her, Miku sticks out a hand, feeling out towards the other person. Another hand emerges from the covers and takes it, encompassing it in warmth. She closes her eyes.

_He is…_

* * *

**A/N:** The mask is broken.

The song is 'A Love Song' by Miku; one of my favorites.


	13. Chapter 13: Attachment

**Chapter 13: Attachment**

There's something far off in the distance. The blackness surrounding him goes on and on as it has for a very long time. What did the world look like before? He can't remember. It's been like this, not anything in sight, for as long as he can remember. But there's something there now. Far off. What is it?

He runs towards it, his footsteps not making a sound in the void. Feelings wash over him as he gets nearer. Surprise, need, confusion, even fear, but overpowering all is want. Longing, yearning. He has to get there. But what is it? What is that?

His hand reaches out and the world comes back into focus; a bedroom, alight with the rays of the morning sun. He lies on his side, one arm extended towards the form settled on the opposite side of the bed. He breathes in deeply, pulling his hand back despite the incredible desire to reach out and stroke the long teal hair that cascades around her, caress her pastel cheeks and rub his thumbs across the pale purple eyelids. To hold her close to him and keep her there.

_"I want to hear you."_

Is it that simple? Shouldn't it be? He cares about her. She cares about him. Shouldn't it all be that simple? But it isn't, is it? No. It can't be.

He sighs, eyes falling over the girl beside him, so close yet so far away. She wanted him to talk to her, to say everything he bottled up and unload it onto her. He could. He would. If that is what she wanted, he would punch a hole in his carefully built wall of control and let her see inside. Only her. But there's one part she shouldn't see. She _can't _see.

No matter what she says, there's one intensifying emotion of his that she can't handle.

He slowly sits up, running his hands through his hair. It's late in the morning – luckily a weekend – and out the one window the sky is a deep blue dotted with wisps of silver clouds. He swings his legs over the side of the bed and sighs, glancing behind him. Still curled in the cotton sheets of his bed Miku groggily opens her eyes and looks up at him confusedly. Seeming to remember the situation she lifts her head, growing more aware. Her mouth hangs slightly open, at a loss for words.

"Oh," is all she says and blinks. Kaito breathes in and closes his eyes for a second, opening them with smile.

"Sorry if I woke you," he mumbles as the girl's eyes widen. She shakes her head and looks away, awkwardly bringing herself into a sitting position.

"No," she whispers and smooths her hair. "I…" she trails off, biting her lip. Kaito recognizes it. She has something to say, but she won't say it. He smiles at her, preparing himself to say what he has to.

"Thank you," he says and she stares at him. He gets up and turns to the window, the light blasting across his face. "I slept well." There is silence behind him as he watches clouds trail across the sky.

"It…" her voice is quiet, hesitant. "It was the best I've slept in a long time."

He parts the curtains farther.

* * *

Miku and Kaito stroll silently down the street as the sun climbs higher into the sky. There's an empty silence between them, neither relaxed nor uncomfortable, as their minds wander over the events of last night. Miku's head spins as she thinks over her new discovery of Kaito, the real Kaito, and the promise she had made to him.

As she had watched him in the darkness of night, lying alone with unspeakable pain written across his face, something explainable had happened. It felt as if something had burst within her, filling her with a confidence and assertion she thought she had lost. Alone in pain, no one to help you, she knew all too well what that was like. No one should have to go through that.

"_No one deserves that."_

Was that why? Was that why he had always stayed by her? Empathy? Knowing the feeling? Was that why he was the only who ever noticed her ache and helplessness?

She glances up at the man striding next to her, hair being blown slightly backwards in the wind. His posture was strong, his expression relaxed. He was hiding again. Hiding his pain under a content temperament as she hid her scars under long sleeves. He did it so well. So well. Unnoticeable.

No. No more. He will not be alone anymore.

A hand grabs her and pulls her back as a motorcycle speeds by the road she was about to step on. Her eyes flash up to meet Kaito glaring at the careless biker and then glancing back at her.

"You okay? Be careful." She nods, blushing, and he releases her hastily, glancing to both sides of the street and then gesturing forward. They cross and wind up in front of a small mom-and-pop café. The smell of frying bacon and maple syrup wafts about and Miku inhales hungrily. They'd come here for breakfast, to meet up with…

A figure detaches himself from a nearby tree and struts up to them. Not covered in rain and mud he looked considerably more presentable with shiny violet hair pulled back in a messy up-do and heavily lashed eyes the color of ice. He pulls his hands out of the pockets of a fur lined jacket and claps enthusiastically as if they are the celebrities, not him.

"Ladies and Gentlemen! Miku Hatsune and Kaito Shion!" Miku raises an eyebrow and passerbys turn and stare, some watching the purple haired man suspiciously.

"Gakupo," Kaito sighs. "Stop before someone calls the police." Gakupo and lowers his hands and glances around innocently.

He lowers his voice and mutters "Or the fangirls. Lethal little things; one yanked a bit of my hair out last time." Miku blinks, wondering how it is that no wandering teenage girl had spotted him yet and attacked. It wasn't as if he was disguised or anything. Maybe since this was his hometown most people were just used to seeing him?

They start into the restaurant, Gakupo jesting with Kaito and slinging his arm over his shoulder like some sort of dancing partner. Kaito is smiling, seemingly happy to see his friend again, and gestures back to Miku, urging her to follow them.

The inside of the café is painted in warm colors with stonework standing out along the floor and up small indoor arches. Large windows look out around the street and onto an outside sitting area. A waitress greets the two of them by name and sets them all at a booth by a window. They look through the menu and order, the waitress quickly dashing off to deliver the order to the cook.

Gakupo turns his head towards her and gazes at her from across the table. She stares back unblinkingly, wondering why people seemed to enjoy gawking at her during mealtimes, and questioning the critical look in his eye as he looked her over.  
He sighed and waved his hand dramatically towards her. "I guess you'll do," he says. Miku frowns and looks at Kaito confusedly, but he raises one hand in Gakupo's direction as if thinking about strangling him. His friend chuckles and rest his gaze back on Miku, which makes her shrink back in anticipation and Kaito seem to get even more annoyed.

"So…"

"Gakupo."

"_SO!"_

_"Dude."_

Miku bites her lip, very confused at whatever strange bromantic language they are speaking in and growing uneasy under the star's gaze. From what she can gather, Gakupo is trying to start something and bring up a topic Kaito really doesn't like. He stares at her and then back at his blue haired friend, then back at her, trading one word phrases and odd gestures.

"Kaito!"

"No."

"_Kaiiiiiiiito~!"_

Amidst the baffling argument, Gakupo's eyes dart once out the café's window and widen, white growing visible around the edges of his irises.

"_Luka!"_ His hands slam onto the table. The other patrons whisper contemptuously and Miku's gaze follows his to the pink haired form outside, strolling nonchalantly down the street with an armload of books. She hadn't heard him.

Without further ado the man jumps up and pulls out his wallet, slamming a few bills onto the tabletop, before dashing out the door. After a moment he comes into view beside the girl, trotting up behind her and shouting. She spins around in surprise and he tackles her, his arms encircling her and spinning her off the ground in a display of euphoria. Her books fly everywhere.

Miku watches in astonishment as he puts her back down, eyes glowing, and continues talking excitedly. Luka expressionlessly reaches down, grabs a book, and hits him upside the head with it. He blinks, going silent, and Luka begins screaming at him, jabbing a finger in his face and stepping closer and closer. Gakupo endures with an expression of fearful admiration.

"Lover's quarrel," Kaito sighs and leans back in his chair. He looks slightly ruffled from whatever had just happened between him and Gakupo, but seems to be brushing it off and smiles as he watches his two friends.

"Are they really?" Miku mutters. Gakupo has picked up her fallen books now and is running after a retreating Luka, her arms crossed in crankiness. Kaito shakes his head and then smiles almost knowingly.

"Without question. Not that they'd ever admit it." Miku turns back to him, his gaze now alight with something else and swallows nervously.

"Your friend…he's a little odd," she finally whispers as their food arrives. The waitress seems rather confused at the loss of one of her customers. Kaito shrugs.

"He's always been that way. Fits his career I guess." He turns to his food and begins cutting it up, silence settling back in-between them. That hadn't been what she was trying to say; she had been referring to the way he treated her, acting as if he had something to say but was fighting with Kaito to say it. He knows that's what she was trying to say.

She looks down at her French toast, a weird mix of emotions moving within her. It could all fit together if she tried to finish the puzzle, but she wasn't sure she wanted to see the end result. That look in his eye, what Gakupo was trying to say, he cares about her, she cares about _him._

_ No._

She glances at him from the corner of her eye, feeling the pieces begin to put themselves together no matter how much she scrambled them.

_I can't, we can't._

That look, this familiar feeling, it can't be, can it?

_ No. That can't…_

She isn't ready for this again.

* * *

**A/N:** There you go, a little more Gakuponess for you. He 'll only appear once more in this story, but I'll have an entire fic filled with him later.

Oh Miku, just face the facts...


	14. Chapter 14: H -16t2 s

**Chapter 14: H = -16t2 + s**

_ What is this? What is happening? _

_'Miku,'_

_ No, not again. I don't understand._

_'Hey?'_

_ It's too much. Too bright. No. Can't._

_'What do you need?'_

_ What do I need? Light? Dark? Shade? Permanence? You? _

_Why try again? What makes it different?_

_ He's different._

_He's different?_

_ I don't know. I don't understand._

_What is it? What is this? Why do I feel so dizzy?_

* * *

Kaito blinks in surprise and scans the area around the door Miku usually waited for him by. Students churn and chat, headed for the lunch room, but there is no sign of the girl in or out of her classroom. He furrows his brow, unease growing inside him at her unexplained disappearance. She had come to school with him as usual and seemed alright, despite the bad night she had had.

He frowns and starts down the hallway, glancing in every door he passes and scanning the crowd, a tension rising within him as he thinks over the course of the night. Miku had turned in early and stumbled up the stairs to her room without a word. He hadn't thought much of it, engrossed in homework as he was. He went upstairs for some reason – to grab a textbook from the study? – and found her. She had been holding herself, sitting on her pillow, staring downward at nothing. He was instantly at her side, trying to comfort in some way, figure out what was wrong, but she only nodded and answered 'fine.' She never even looked at him.

He checks the nurse's office. No Miku there. He runs into Len. Hasn't seen her. The library is devoid of shy young women. Anywhere he can think of he goes to, but finds nothing. The hallways are long empty. He holds their uneaten lunches in one hand.

Where would she go? Where else is there? The nurse, the cafeteria, the library…

Eyes widening, he spins around and runs back the way he came.

* * *

Sitting under the budded branches of trees in the second courtyard is Miku, her legs pulled up towards her on the bench, her eyes raised to the sky. Kaito sighs, half in relief, half in melancholy. This was the exact same spot he had found her during lunch back at the beginning of fall. It was late spring now, and just as the buds had opened up, so had the girl that intuition had told him to protect. Sitting there, she doesn't seem quite so scared and ill at ease. There is thought surrounding her, tinged with a hint of confusion and distress, but she is straight-backed. Her eyes are bright.

As he opens the door soundlessly he head turns and her gaze rests on him, a strange look of worry underneath, as if whatever had just crossed her mind was not something she had really wanted to comprehend. He smiles encouragingly and walks over. She lowers her legs.

"Hey," he calls and holds out the lunch bag to her. "I didn't know you were coming here." She reaches out and takes the bag, absentmindedly pulling out an apple and rolling it in her hands.

"I wanted to be alone," she says bluntly. Kaito feels the words like a blow to the gut.

"Oh,"

"No," she corrected quickly in her usual timorous voice. "Just…not the others."

"Oh," Kaito sighed again, breathing in air he hadn't realized he needed. With a swift glance upwards the girl scoots over on the bench, clearing room or him.

"You could've waited for me," he pestered as he sat down. "Said where you were going. I was worried." The last sentence slowly trails off and he looks away from her, clamping his mouth shut before unnecessary words spill out. The girl is silent for a moment. There is a crunch as she bites into the apple, chews, and swallows.

"…How are you today?" Kaito turns in surprise to stare confusedly at the girl, who seems to be staring at the apple as if it tried to bite her. Her eyebrows are furrowed, eyes blinking, and head slightly tilted as if thinking very hard.

"I…" So far his day had rather sucked. He didn't drink any coffee this morning, been slapped upside the head by a very irritable Rin, gotten a 'D' on a paper, and stepped in a wad of gum, all before lunchtime. Even as he went to collect Miku from her classroom, he had felt like punching something.

"I…"

The girl is looking at him now, listening, and he realizes with a start that she actually wants to know the answer. She wants to know if he's happy, if he's okay. She wants to know if he's not feeling well.

"I… I'm great."

"That's good," she says, seeming rather startled at the intensity at which she says it. She turns back to her apple, chewing on it slowly. Kaito watches her, an almost uncomfortable warmth growing in his stomach.

When was the last time someone truly cared that much?

* * *

Miku walked home alone, thoughts spinning dully in her head. She had long since tried to stop them. Refusing to acknowledge them seemed to be the best she could do.

'_How are you?'_

_'I'm great."_

The mask he wore always got a little thinner now when they were alone. In that moment, she had seen something happen. He had registered surprise, recognition, and then pleasure. She had done it. She listened and made him talk. She had made him happy by simply asking if he was.

Her eyes close and she stops walking for a moment, pushing down the thoughts that try to surge up the pathway that this state of mind created.

It's changing. Everything's changing.

_You made him happy._

_No._

_ That made you happy._

_No._

_ Shouldn't that be it?_

_No._

_ It can't be like that. Can't be that simple. _

_It's terrifying._

_No. _

It could never happen. It just wouldn't work. He's too kind, too blind to see that he deserves so much more than her. That sheisn't right, not right for him.

_You only feel okay when he's there. More than that,_

_He makes you happy, doesn't he?_

_ No. I'm no good. I'll only cause him trouble._

_There's something wrong, it wouldn't be successful_

Her eyes open and take in the front of the house, his house. It's a common townhome, thin but long, with a small front and back yard, and other homes planted just far enough away. She blinks as a figure approaches her from the doorway, his long hair tied in a messy French braid and hands in his pockets. He tilts his head at her.

"So…" Gakupo drawls and looks her up and down. Miku glances away.

"He's not with me. A class got rescheduled for later."

The man blinks and narrows his eyes. He is tall, almost as tall as Kaito, and the top of her head barely comes up to his chin. With an exasperated huff he turns and sits on the steps leading to the front door. "That's what I thought."

Miku frowns, confused at what he is trying to say. He had only been here a few days now and she hadn't really had much of a conversation with him yet. She still had no real opinion of the man.

Suddenly he gives out a drawling screech and sprawls himself out over the stairs. Miku jumps back in alarm and prepares to run for it when his voice burrs out, "_Damn_, this is stupid!" She stares at him, more concerned than ever about the state of his mind, and considering whipping out her phone to call the police. _Or the fangirls, _she recalls drearily.

"_Look," _he speaks abruptly, suddenly pulling himself up. He seems very determined on what to say but quickly deflates again, the words seeming to escape him. Miku sighs and musters every bit of courage she has. It's a little chilly out and she has schoolwork to do. What is this cretin doing keeping her out of her house without any real reason?

"If you have something to say, just say it," she commands in what she hopes sounds like an imitating voice. The man makes spreads his hands out towards her and claws at the air affectedly

"Life…" he spits out, lowering his hands and seeming very angry at himself. "Life really sucks, doesn't it?" Miku's eyes widen and he continues, running his hands through his bangs and scowling at the concrete. "You get hurt, you never get rewarded, nothing's fair, but you're just expected to keep living it, aren't you?" Miku feels her hands clench, sees images flicker past her lids, inaudible sounds blare.

"This world…is just horrible, isn't it?" He says finally with eyes that seem far away. "There's so much in it that would just make one wonder why anyone would want to live in a world like this."

Her eyes close. Yes. This is all true. Parents that don't love, adults that don't teach, crime, hurt, death, all of it; why does anyone live here?

"But people live here, they keep living life, because," her eyes open and meet his, not scarred and troubled, but understanding and knowledgeable with seeing so much of humanity.

"Because, the world is a beautiful place too."

Miku blinks, his words sinking in. She glances around herself at this little fraction of the world. The wind rustles through trees, birds chirp from hidden places. There are children laughing behind her. The sun is out. She looks up and for a moment notices how truly vast the sky is, how it goes on and on forever. Smoke from nearby chimneys floats up into it, staining it, but it dissipates, fading away into the blue and the sunlight until it's only one part of a much bigger picture.

"There are things here that are worth seeing, worth experiencing. People live for those things because they are worth living for." He sighs, seeming to collect himself, and stands, facing Miku and breathing in deeply.

"It'll all work out. Nothing exists that isn't meant to. Nothing happens that wasn't meant to." he whispers. After a silent stare and another sigh he begins to stride away. "Just…remember that."

Miku watches as he disappears down the sidewalk, becoming a purple blob in the distance before turning off the street. She stares in that direction a long time afterward, too sidetracked to bother moving her gaze.

Just those words, is that all is takes?

_The world is beautiful_

_Everything has a purpose_

_ Everything was meant to happen_

_They keep living because…_

Because even in the darkness, you can find light?

* * *

**A/N: **If you couldn't guess, Kaito told Gakupo the basics about Miku. Including that he's in love with her. That scene will come up in Gakupo's story.

Over 1000 views and almost 30 comments! I don't know if that's considered a lot, but it feels like an achievement to me! Thanks! XD

The climax is quickly approaching! Prepare yourself! There's only three more chapters!

P.S. The chapter title is a simple equation for a falling object. Falling. Do you get it?


	15. Chapter 15: Velocity

**Chapter 15: Velocity**

_ The room is not dark, not scary, merely empty. Sounds filter in from other places, but none originate from this room, the highest in the house. The boy sits in the corner, hugging himself, numb tears in the back of his eyes. Sunlight streams through a curtained window._

_ Something's not right. Why is he alone? Someone is supposed to be with him._

* * *

_ Alone? She might as well be. Those eyes hold no recognition; there's no one here who would help her anyway. There's nothing here. It's not here. This isn't where she needs to be. There's something else, somewhere far away. That's where she needs to go._

_ She grabs the bags and runs out the door, leaving her mother's angry shouts behind her._

* * *

Kaito looks upwards towards the sky, adorned with spots of white and wisps of smoke from people still using their fireplaces. The area beyond is a limitless blue, expanding on and on through space, tinged with yellow at the edges from the afternoon sun. The air is crisp and chilled, the smell of the city blown away by the slight wind.

He readjusts his bag on his shoulder and steps out of the college gates. Apparently some kind of emergency had come up for the teacher of his last class and the course had been pushed off until later in the day. He had studied in the library until class time and sent Miku home-

Miku.

His chest clenches with the ache that is becoming more and more familiar, and he forces himself to keep walking, to look ahead. However, he knows that trying to deny the feeling would be futile. His thoughts explode, washing through his brain and sending images and memories to the surface.

When was it? Was it really so long ago? Only ¾ of a year. A name called. A chair squeaking back. Wide blue eyes set in a fragile pale face. A hand. A house. Meetings around a library table. That was where it started, but how did it get to this point?

He slowly strides down the sidewalk, eyes trained on the ground, mind filled with cotton balls. He passes by a stone wall holding a slope of shrubbery back. A cat lazily rests there; one eye opens to watch him pass and closes again with a flick of its tail. A brisk spring wind picks up and blows his hair back. He breathes in the gust.

Afraid of her home. Sick days. Karaoke. A warning. A visit. Words under leafless cherry trees. All that followed. Ice cream. Comforting. Crying. When was it? He can't figure it out. There was no big point of change, was there? Just realization.

When had it happened? Had he always felt this way?

When had he fallen in love with her?

He stares ahead at the red crossing light, with the dim fear that it may never turn green.

* * *

The concrete pounds under her feet and she gasps for breath, cursing her lack of athleticism. Rounding the final corner, her eyes fall on the gates of the university; no students filter out. The school is dark.

She looks around frantically. If he was coming home, shouldn't she have passed him on the way? Was there another way to go? With a desperate glance at all the streets diverging from the entrance she thinks back, tries to remember the layout of them. That one was to the park, that's Main Street, that leads to the shopping district…

She turns to the last one and begins jogging down it, ignoring the protesting in her muscles and lungs, and scanning any passerby on both sides of the street. Her hair falls haphazardly into her face and she pushes it back with one hand, coming around a corner at barely more than a speed-walk. Eyes closed, she lets of a yelp of pain as she steps on something and a sharp pain rips across her calf through her tights. An angry kitty hisses at her and scampers away into nearby bushes, tail bent at a painful angle.

She doesn't stop to check her leg; she doesn't even know if he's on this path. She doesn't have time to waste. Maybe she should just go home? Wait for him there? No, she has to find him now. But what for?

She has to go. The world is horrible. The world is sad. Life is painful. But it's not dark. It's not. Darkness can only exist when there's no light, and this world is certainly not lightless. She has the light, and it's okay to use it

_'It'll all work out.'_

She found it. She knows where he can find it too.

She pushes forward, now only walking and breathing in deep inhales of much needed oxygen. Her eyes close of their own accord. She stumbles, not realizing that she's about to fall. Her mind is still focused, _forward, forward._

A patter of feet and a hand catches her arm, pulling her upright. Her eyes flash open and she yanks her arm away, stepping backward in alarm. Her mouth opens as she takes in the person before her, coming closer even as she speaks.

"Kaito." His hands wander over her hair, putting it back in place and wiping beads of sweat off her face. She tenses under his gaze, full of so obvious emotion. He doesn't really seem to notice his motions, just stares at her with eyes wide with concern.

"Miku, what happened?" She looks down at herself, noting her torn stockings, muddy shoes, and windblown hair.

"I…was running," she pants out and shrugs shakily. With a confused look, he tows her over into an inlet under the trees and onto a bench.

"I see that," he murmurs and kneels down, checking over her leg as if it was a wound from a knife, not a cat.

"What have you been doing?" she asks and he looks up, tilting his head slightly. "I came to look for you because you hadn't come back yet."

He looks away, a vague frown spreading across his lips. Absentmindedly, he pulls out a spare tissue from his pocket and dabs at the scrape on her leg, before wrapping the fabric around it and tying it off. "I was walking," he responds simply and turns back to her. "You don't look so good. Are you okay?" She nods and smooths her clothes, still attempting to catch her breath. He frowns at her worriedly, his hands absently resting on the material of her skirt.

She takes in deep breaths, feeling the words just behind her lips, afraid to say them, afraid to step into that unknown area, but knowing all the same that she will say them. The answer needs to be there. She needs to speak. He needs to speak.

"Why…" she begins and he perks his head up. How does he know that? How can he always tell what she's going to say?

"Why do you, why have you…taken care of me?" He stares ambiguously at her, his eyes like one-way mirrors. Cars drive past outside of the small court and send rustles of wind through his hair.

"You're a good person. You want to help people. That makes sense. That could be why. But," she bites her lip, worry once again washing over her. "But that's not the reason, is it?"

Very slowly he stands up, his gaze resting on her for a moment before closing. He makes no movement; his eyelids don't even flutter as he stands there, still as a statue.

"Why?" she whispers, searching for a response, so certain of the answer, so wanting it, yet so afraid of it. It would be easier to stop here, to let the subject drop. They could go on forever, never knowing the answer. They would be fine.

No.

Even if it's scary, even if it's unknown,

_There are things here that are worth seeing, worth experiencing._

_There are things worth living for._

"Why do you do all this for someone as worthless as me?"

His eyes flash open, filling with a flash of bitterness that she knows is not directed at her. Hands clench and unclench at his sides and he looks away, a soft yet intense gaze on the grass.

"A long time ago," he murmurs and moves his hand through his tousled hair. "I said…that I cared about you." Miku watches in attention as he slowly moves his gaze to hers, their eyes locking and reflecting the same need, concern, and confusion as the other.

"Did," he whispers as Miku's breath catches in her throat. The emotion is clear in his eyes now. She definitely recognizes it. It's lighter than the other one, the first one, somehow more pure, as if it were made entirely out of light and warmth.

"Did you not understand what that meant?"


	16. Chapter 16: Destination

**A/N:** Ah! I feel so sad! It's almost over! But, there's one more chapter after this, so don't think this is the end!

Oh, and I have to start writing the next story soon, so, tell me readers, which of these pairings do you want me to write about first? Luka and Gakupo, or Rin and Len? Leave a comment; majority rules!

This is a cute chapter ^-^

* * *

**Chapter 16: Destination**

_"Your journey has molded you for your greater good, and it was exactly what it needed to be. Don't think you've lost time. There is no short-cutting to life. It took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the now. And now is right on time." _

_― Asha Tyson_

* * *

Kaito stares into the eyes of the girl in front of him, teal pools filled with wonder and perplexity. Her hair tumbles haphazardly out of its ponytail, stands of the silk falling over her shoulders and around her ears. She bites her lip, tiny white teeth digging into chapped skin the color of roses.

_Mistake?_

_ Dirty?_

His hands lay limp at his sides, unable to move, he's unable to do anything but stare at this lovely girl who seems to have such a distorted view of herself. She doesn't realize…doesn't understand…

"You're shy," he whispers as keeps his gaze locked with hers. "Delicate. Timid." Events float back into his memory, words that she said, that others said, things she had done, what she made him feel.

"Smart. Kind. Beautiful." Her mouth parts slightly and he feels the slightest of smiles break across his face. "Those were the things, are the things, that I think about you." She blinks at him, her shoulders sagging as her attention focuses away from them.

"Something I never thought, and never could think, was what you just said." Her gaze travels down, wide, looking at the ground with pupils that almost shake. Kaito could tell what was going through her mind, the kind of mental turmoil that must be unwinding in there. Years, years of abuses and inflictions, fighting against just a few words that banged on the wall of hate like a ram.

"You gave me something, nothing 'worthless' could do that," he whispers and her eyes trail back up to him, blue, dazed. "You always give me something, something I can't name, but it's always there. It's something I need." He waits a moment, letting her prepare for the next words, preparing himself to say them, preparing for her reaction. She watches him, and he feels himself being forced to look at her. Her. Only her. She's the only one.

"I need_ you_."

The area is silent expect for the flutter of bird wings and the rush of cars going past. Her sides go in and out, breathing, thinking, she closes her eyes.

"Is…is it so odd?" Kaito furrows his eyebrows the slightest bit, his lips parting. Her voice is muffled as she hangs her head slightly, her bangs fall from behind an ear.

"I'm afraid," she whispers after a moment. "I'm afraid of the future. I'm afraid of the past. Sometimes I don't want to put my foot out from the bed for fear the floor won't be there." She sits there, fragile and yet sturdy, despondent yet burning with an unusual glow. She tries to form words a few times before sounds actually come out.

"I'd give up. I…would've given up by now." Kaito takes in a breath, understanding the statement, and refraining himself from letting out a sound of misery at the thought. She continues slowly, her eyes open and far away, but alight with something like the rising sun.

"It's okay though," suddenly she stands and walks forward until positioned right before Kaito and looking upwards, the sunlight streaming across her face. "This'll be okay."

His eyes widen at the words, at the memories of all the things he had seen her endure. Wasted nights, days of useless crying, through all that he had been the one saying things like that, to her, to himself, hoping that if he said it enough it would come true.

"Is it so impossible? So scary? Is it so odd?" she repeats again in a voice as fleeting as the wind.

"You need me, and I need you."

The words trail off, leaving behind a hint of how much courage it took the girl to voice them. Things like this, relationships, dependence, they had only ever ended in pain for her. To make herself try again, to not give up…

'_Don't leave me'_

_ 'I want to hear you'_

His arms wrap around her faster than he thought possible, pulling her close to him is a rush of rustling fabric and flying hair. As tiny as she is, his arms are able to reach all the way around her, almost grabbing himself on the other side, and he stoops over, his head hovering just inches above her shoulder. She gives out a gasp as they clash together, struggling to get her arms out from between them and slowly extending them up, up his back, and clutching around his shoulder blades. After a moment her fingers dig in tighter, her face pressing against his chest. He breathes in, smelling the clean fragrance of her , and putting his face against her own.

"We'll be together, right?" she breathes, her voice choked. "We'll take care of each other." His arms tighten and his eyes close, feeling the sunlight, feeling the weight of her against him, storing every bit of this moment into his memory.

"_Miku,"_ he mutters into her ear, one hand moving to the back of her head, smoothing her hair. "So long ago…I promised so long ago, and," he swallows and pulls back just far enough to look at her, see the bright aqua eyes he wanted to see every day for the rest of his life. "I never break my promises."

"I'll protect you. I'll never leave you." He shushes her, cutting off her assurance, her pledge that she will do the same, and hesitantly moves his hands upward, coming to rest along the smooth curves of her face. His thumb traces her cheekbone; his palm cupping the corner of her mouth.

"I don't want to live without you. I love you. Always."

She blinks once, and then slowly mouths the words, trying them out, and repeats them, the sounds ringing out clear. Shakily she leans upwards, standing on her tippy-toes, and lidding her eyes so slightly. He leans down and their lips connect with a sound as soft as a falling flower petal. Her hands wrap around his neck, his still rest on her face, holding her close to him. Wind rustles through the trees.

They pull back after a moment, her eyes wide with marvel and his mouth curving into a tender smile. He reaches down and grabs her hand, interlacing their fingers and keeping their arms close.

"Let's go home." He says, and they start down the road.

* * *

The boy cries around the edges of his pillow, his face buried into the plushness to mute the sound. His tears stain the fabric and create hot sticky trails down his face. Uncle's out working. Aunt took Cousin to the doctor. He's left at home. He's alone.

A sound alerts him and he glances over the edge of the cushion at the door, eyes widening in surprise as it opens despite how he had locked it. A pale hand reaches around the edge and a young girl peers around the frame. She steps inside, her gaze low, and shuts the door behind her. She looks at him, huddled in the corner and walks over, her short teal pigtails swaying with the motion.

"Why are you crying?" she asks quietly. He shakes his head and tries to move farther into the wall.

"L-Leave me alone," he hiccups. The girl tilts her head and comes to her knees, at eye level with the boy. She's about his age, maybe a little younger, but there's an air about her that expresses experience, as if she knows more about him than he knows himself.

"No," she says simply and sits down, scooting herself next to him. The boy sobs a few more times as she sits there, fighting against the tears that pour like rain, before going quiet.

"Why are you crying?" she questions again, gently. He turns to her, sitting in the sunlight under the window, and locks her gaze.

"Why do you want to know?" She moves forward and puts a hand lightly on his shoulder. Her eyes are tender, sad.

"Maybe I can make you stop." The boy's eyes widen and shivers begin to wrack his body again; he curls over with the action and the girl catches him, cradling his head in her lap and brushing water and hair out of his eyes. He reaches up blindly and touches something; her hand. It tightens around his own and she lays the intertwined limbs on his stomach. Soft words spill from her mouth, music, as she holds him and his tears slowly begin to ebb. His hand squeezes around hers.

_Here. This is a person who wants to hear you._

* * *

The girl dashes along the streets, her bag banging against her leg. Running and running, there seems like no reason she should ever stop. The sky is a monochrome grey, painting the world in mute colors. Her breath comes faster and faster, her muscles ache, but she keeps going, certain that she needs to get somewhere, but without an idea of where that somewhere is.

Her feet pound, going forward, forward, away from whatever the thing is that's behind her. It breathes down her neck, slinking slowly and surely towards her. She has to get away. That's not where she needs to be.

The sidewalk slides out from under her and she goes tumbling, her arms skinning against the concrete. The air is knocked from her body and she lies there stunned, feeling the thing, the darkness, pull itself closer to her.

Her eyes close and she sighs. What is the point in running anymore? It followed her wherever she went; not even in her dreams could she escape it. There is no point, no point. She moves her head to look ahead, to allow herself one last look at life before the shadows claim her. Her neck strains, her shoulders crunch.

A gasp of air forces itself into her lungs and she pulls herself up again, feeling the tendrils of shadow snap off her ankles and melt away before the figure in the distance. Vitality pours into her, emotions that had long been extinct; joy, hope, a want to live. His back is to her, but she knows who it is, _what_ he is.

She calls out his name and he spins around, his arms opening to catch her as she flings herself at him. They fold comfortingly around her, radiating warmth and sunlight.

"I've been waiting for you," he says, and tucks her head under his chin. She holds tighter, eliminating any space between them, allowing the light to wash over her, clean her.

Yes, she knows who he is.

_This man is…_

_He is…_

_This is the place I was trying to get to._


	17. Epilogue: Home

**Epilogue: Home**

The trees whoosh as the wind rushes through them, rustling their branches and sending leaves to the ground. The child in the yard laughs atop his father's shoulders and reaches for the twirling foliage, a toddler's chubby fingers outlined against the sky, his teal hair blown around his plump face.

His mother watches from the large porch of the house, smiling at her two boy's antics. Her husband spins to face her, his blue eyes shining in the summer sun, and picks the child off his head. He sets him on the grass and he runs about, toddling over the grass and giggling at a pair of robins as they fly off. The man strides over the lawn and trots up the steps to the deck chair she sits in. Slipping behind her, he wraps his arms around her shoulders and lays his chin on her head.

"It's lovely today," she whispers, feeling the warmth of two suns, one in the sky and one behind her, spread through her body. Her eyes follow the boy as he runs across the lawn, stopping to observe toadstools or look at the clouds. At just four years old, their boy was surprisingly bright, already understanding and appreciating far more than any other children his age.

The man sighs his agreement, his fingers tracing circles on her bare shoulders, caressing faint lines and scars that mark the skin there, smoothing them and sending soft tingles down her spine. She reaches up and grabs his hand, her eyes wandering to him.

"It's so beautiful," she says and he looks down at her. His gaze holds no thought, no question; they had long since decided that this was the truth. Not hate and pain and sadness, but beauty. And love. He presses his lips against her forehead, tenderly, and pulls her out of the chair and into the yard.

Their child squeals as they join him in his adventures through the lawn, helping him climb small trees and carrying him over mud puddles. He buries his face is his mother's pant leg with a chirp of 'Come catch me!' and runs off towards the house. She gives chase, arms extended for the little boy and calling his name, "Mikuo! Mikuo!" as he jumps up the porch steps. Her husband jogs next to her, chuckling affectionately.

The white siding of the house gleams in the afternoon sun, the home's doorway open to catch the warm breeze; a large two story colonial, with a high sloping roof and a smaller wing branching of from its side. An atrium window adorns the front of the building, positioned above the roof of a wraparound porch. It is a familiar house, one made just to their specifications, one that they made themselves.

They had built a new house. After a while, that old one filled with the past was simply too small for them anymore.

* * *

_Only three things endure forever: Faith, Hope, and Love – But the greatest of these is Love._

* * *

**A/N:** _The End! _For real this time. Oh my gosh, I feel so sad yet happy right now. I mean, this was only a fanfiction, but I feel like I worked on it forever. I had this idea in my head for years so I suppose I have; I can't believe it's over!

The greatest and most sincere thanks to anyone who favorited, commented, or read this and it's preceding fic. I hope you all enjoyed it.

I'd especially like to thank Red Eagle, Ten-Faced, and Postquam est for their continued support. Thank you so much and please continue to watch me :)

Since I pushed myself so hard on writing and posting this fic quickly, I'm going to take a break for a while to recuperate and get the creative juices flowing again. Don't worry though! As you know, I work at the speed of light so I'll be back in a week or two. Stay on the lookout for me!

It was a close call (like literally, they won by one vote) but I'll be writing for Luka and Gakupo next. Their story will be called The World's Worst and will in include gratuitious amounts of the off-the-wall samurai that appeared in this one. Not to mention straight-man (Er, woman) Luka who puts up with his antics. I'm really excited for this one and I'll begin writing as soon as I have time.

I'll see you all soon! :D

_Beiowulf_


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